Bottom Shelf Books

BSB Flashback: Hop on Pop

2010-04-07T23:03:00.000-05:00

9 April 2007

Author/Illustrator: Dr. Seuss

Many point to Bruno Bettelheim's award winning book, The Uses of Enchantment: The Meaning and Importance of Fairy Tales, as the moment that Freudian psychoanalysis officially came in contact with the realm of children's literature. While it is true that Bettleheim may have been one of the first academics to tackle the subject, it was the seminal work of Theodore Geisel (Dr. Seuss) that introduced children to Freud for the first time. Case in point: his playful exploration of the Oedipal complex: Hop on Pop.

Hop on Pop was published in 1963, a full 13 years before Bettelheim's Enchantment, and decades before Freud was widely dismissed by the psychological community as a coked-up sex fiend. Pop can be read as a thinly veiled introduction to the disturbing psychosexual theory that the father is the enemy who is preventing us from realizing some deeply ingrained sexual need for our mothers. Gross! Luckily, Seuss didn't get too caught up in the raging Sigmundsteria of the times, otherwise he may have been tempted to go all-out Oedipal and written his book as Hop on Pop then Marry Mommy, which probably would have tarnished his otherwise untouchable legacy.

Upon closer inspection, Freud and other psychological influences can be found sprinkled throughout Seuss's work. The Cat in the Hat is nothing more than a hyperkinetic romp through the subconscious with the Id, Ego, and Superego. The entire plot of Green Eggs and Ham is driven by Freud's theories of the repression and sublimation of base impulses. (What else could "Sam I Am" be, other than an anal-retentive individual's guilt-ridden projection of the repressed self and its latent desires?) And Horton Hears a Who? Horton hears a psychiatrist diagnosing him with schizophrenia, that's who he hears. In fact, if you read too closely, Seussville runs the risk of becoming an inescapable labyrinth of Freudian slips and slides... so maybe we're better off reading with eyes wide shut.

White House Reading

2010-03-28T17:38:00.006-05:00

Last week, President Obama was spotted at Prairie Lights bookstore in Iowa City, where he picked up a few books for Sasha and Malia. The two books he chose (based on recommendations) were “Journey to the River Sea” by Eva Ibbotson and “The Secret of Zoom” by Lynn Dornell. While I haven't read the books (too many words, not enough pictures), a quick look reveals a rather thoughtful selection.

From Amazon's Journey to the River Sea Review:

Sent in 1910 to live with distant relatives who own a rubber plantation along the Amazon River, English orphan Maia is excited. She believes she is in for brightly colored macaws, enormous butterflies, and "curtains of sweetly scented orchids trailing from the trees." Her British classmates warn her of man-eating alligators and wild, murderous Indians. Unfortunately, no one cautions Maia about her nasty, xenophobic cousins, who douse the house in bug spray and forbid her from venturing beyond their coiffed compound.

From The Secret of Zoom website:

Christina lives in a stone mansion on the edge of a forest surrounded by barbed wire, an electrified fence, and signs that read TRESPASSERS WILL BE BOILED. Deep within the forest is the laboratory where her mother was blown to bits when Christina was just a baby. Christina’s father, the head scientist at Loompski Labs, knows how dangerous the world can be. So he keeps his daughter safe at home and forbids her to talk to the very interesting orphans down the road.

Both books feature a young girl who finds herself in unfamiliar surroundings and who must deal with a restriction on her freedom... which must resonate with the Obama girls as they cope with their new home in the Washington DC fishbowl and deal with living under the constant surveillance of the Secret Service.

The Obamas seem to have done a pretty good job of shielding their children from the intense scrutiny of the press (man-eating alligators?) and other intrusive forces, but I'm sure they are still concerned about their daughters' adjustment to life in the White House. Perhaps the Obamas have decided to turn to the world of children's literature for additional perspective. And even if the books weren't chosen for that reason, it was a fortuitous selection that should make for some interesting reading in the Obama household.

Note: I'll have to read the books to provide any more insight or parallels, but I'm willing to bet that the brightly colored macaw is a stand-in for John Boehner.

Another Painting

2010-03-26T02:02:00.002-05:00

Azul (R.I.P.)

Fun For Its Own Sake

2010-03-16T22:57:00.005-05:00

My good friend Alexander Nazaryan just posted an interview with Donald Pease, the author of a new Seuss biography. My favorite revelation:

After World War II, Hollywood wanted Geisel. He was hired to write a script for Rebel Without A Cause. But in 1953, his wife Helen began to develop a debilitating disease, Guillain-Barré syndrome, and the helplessness he experienced led to another deep reevaluation of what he was doing. He wanted to enter into an art form in which unconditioned laughter emerges out of the sheer fun of making fun, and he associates this form with children’s books. In creating propaganda, he was creating enemies. Now he wanted to get the war mentality out of his psyche and out of America’s consciousness by creating children’s books.

First of all, interesting to see the reasoning behind Geisel's decision to go into children' books... second of all, Rebel Without a Cause?!

I'd love to see the Seussian treatment of Rebel... though I guess if there was ever a rebel without a cause, it was the Cat in the Hat.

White Noise

2010-03-07T18:48:00.007-05:00

Author/Illustrator: David A. Carter

While none of the publishers seem to acknowledge the connection, it can’t be a coincidence that White Noise, David A. Carter’s brilliant new pop-up book, just happened to be published on the 25th anniversary of Don DeLillo’s postmodern classic by the same name. (Okay, it's probably a coincidence, but I’m plowing ahead anyways.)

You would have thought that adapting Don DeLillo's anxiety ridden novel for a picture book audience would be an impossible task... but if you’re familiar with Carter’s work, you’ll know that he eats impossible for breakfast. And once again, Carter delivers the impossible.

Carter has established himself as the grandmaster of the medium and his latest offering is a breathtakingly whimsical feat of the imagination, each page bursting with visual and sonic surprises (yes, I said sonic. The pages are cleverly constructed in a way so that they snap, crackle, and pop). Once again, Carter has pushed the boundaries of the pop-up book, elevating it from novelty act to work of art… and in this case, a metaphysical statement that effectively captures the nuanced anxiety of DeLillo's masterwork.

There are many themes running through DeLillo's novel, the most pervasive of which is the fear of death. All the characters in the novel are obsessed (if not consumed) with the unavoidable fact of their mortality. With this sense of impending doom invading even the most mundane activities, the characters are left with the lingering sense that the daily tedium of their lives (especially the solipsistic posturing of academia) is nothing more than a pleasant diversion from the gradual deterioration of our physical selves.

This concept brilliantly is captured in Carter’s book because (as all librarians know) the pop-up book is an essentially tragic instrument. The minute you open the book, you have begun to destroy it. With each pull and tug of the intricately constructed pages, the book inches closer and closer to its ultimate demise.

And yet, its very existence is an act of defiance. Knowing full well that it is not long for this world, the pop-up book is a bold statement that even if life is short, it is more than just an exercise in futility. Life may be just "a tangle of bits and pieces and tinkling white noise", but it can be darned beautiful while it lasts.

Whether it's 25 years... or 25 minutes.

EEEEEEE!!! Books!!!

2010-02-08T23:32:00.004-05:00

An interesting article about some of the backroom brawling over e-books, by my good buddy David Gelles who writes for the Financial Times:

It was the day after Apple unveiled its iPad and Macmillan’s John Sargent was heading for the Amazon.com headquarters in Seattle on a hastily arranged visit. The chief executive of the venerable publisher arrived with an ultimatum for the world’s largest bookseller – either let Macmillan charge more for its electronic books or wait a painful six months after it made new titles available through other outlets, including on the iPad.
Amazon balked. By the time Mr Sargent returned to New York that evening, it had begun removing all Macmillan titles – both e-books and physical books – from its website. If Macmillan wanted to play hardball, it seemed Amazon was game.

Jazz ABZ: An Education (C for Coltrane)

2010-02-08T22:36:00.000-05:00

Here is the next stop on our alphabetical journey through our Jazz ABZs*: C for Coltrane.

This is the first track that made me really appreciate jazz... and to this day, it's my standby when I feel the need to chill out and write.

Track 3: I'm Old Fashioned**

*a personal project to go through Marsalis's Jazz ABZs and find a representative song (or just a song that I like) performed by each artist, with the goal of creating a decent playlist to accompany the book... and to flesh out my knowledge of jazz. It's also just another opportunity to admire the art of Paul Rogers, which is always a good thing.
**written by Jerome Kerns

Waiting for Winter

2010-02-05T04:34:00.009-05:00

Author/Illustrator: Sebastian Meschenmoser

There's not much to be said about this beautiful book that isn't already covered by Elizabeth Bird (as is usually the case), so make sure to read her review. The story is a simple one about forest friends who put off hibernation to stay up and wait for their first snowfall. While waiting, they hypothesize about the nature of snow based on the limited information at their disposal. It's a cute story to be sure and it captures the essential wonder that can come with discovery of the world around us.

I would go into more detail, but the interplay between the illustrations and the pacing of the text is so pitch perfect, it'd be hard to do it justice without spoiling the book. I've only seen two books from him, but Meschenmoser is already one of my favorite illustrators, so if you haven't seen any of his stuff yet, get thee to a library/bookstore! (and check out 7-Imp's feature on him to see some more of his amazing artwork).

Something I will say about the book is that it does a great job of allowing the child to play the role of, for lack of a better phrase, the arbiter of reason. As the furry friends throw out one misguided theory after another, the young reader is pushed from amusement into bemusement, which is a more complex form of humor. They'll be able to shake their heads and, with a wry smile, think something along the lines of "Silly animals, one day they'll realize how wrong they were... when they're older and wiser like me."

This is a rare space for a child to occupy because for the majority of their day they are the inexperienced ones fumbling to make sense of the world. It's a subtle form of role playing which is key for socioemotional development. (Just watch a kid parenting a doll or playing house and you'll see that pretending to be an adult is more than just putting on oversized clothes, they're trying on oversized emotions and roles that preview and help prepare them for the world that awaits.) Waiting for Winter gives the child this kind of temporary "promotion" in the hierarchy of reason... which is quite an achievement for a picture book that is also darned funny.

And speaking of winter, DC is about to get hit by another record snow today. Woohoo!

Note: An always welcome shoutout from the illustrious Fuse #8 at the School Library Journal:

If I have any objection to lodge against Minh of the blog Bottom Shelf Books it is that he appears to have a life of some sort. How else to explain why he chooses to post only once in a while about the picture book genre. Had I my way he would have a miserable existence where only constant blog postings provided him enough comfort and relief to get through a day. Then I could get daily posts out of the man. Ha ha! Instead, I will have to content myself with pieces like this truly lovely take on Sebastian Meschenmoser's Waiting for Winter. I reviewed it myself last year after finding it to be just the greatest little book in creation. Even if you don't believe either of us, believe The New York Times. Minh makes some excellent points about it that completely escaped my notice.

Jazz ABZ: An Education (B for Basie)

2010-02-03T22:49:00.009-05:00

Here is the next stop on our alphabetical journey through our Jazz ABZs*: B for Basie.

Track 2: One O'Clock Jump

Bonus Track: How Long Blues**

*a personal project to go through Marsalis's Jazz ABZs and find a representative song (or just a song that I like) performed by each artist, with the goal of creating a decent playlist to accompany the book... and to flesh out my knowledge of jazz. It's also just another opportunity to admire the art of Paul Rogers, which is always a good thing.
**written by Leroy Carr

Jazz ABZ Playlist so far:

West End Blues (Louis Armstrong)
One O'Clock Jump (Count Basie)

Jazz ABZ: An Education (A for Armstrong)

2010-02-03T20:37:00.015-05:00

When I first saw Jazz ABZ by Wynton Marsalis (with contributions from Phil Schaap and amazing artwork from Paul Rogers), I thought it would have been great to have an accompanying cd or playlist to go with it, to give the reader a sample of each artist's music.

Well, it's been almost three years now and no one has provided me with that playlist yet (How rude!). I guess I'm going to do it myself. The timing is right because I'm trying to expand my minimal knowledge of jazz. So, as a personal exercise, I'm going to start posting a song (either a signature song or one that I just happen to like) performed by each of the artists in the book until I work my way all the way through. (Along the way, if anyone has other songs to recommend, feel free to pass it along.)

I guess the beginning is as good a place to start as any:

Track 1: West End Blues*

Bonus: Do You Know What It Means To Miss New Orleans**

*written by King Oliver
**written by Eddie DeLange and Louis Alter

Color Me Impressed

2010-01-27T23:25:00.011-05:00

A friend recently pointed me to this NPR link on colors and this amazing graphic showing how our choices of crayon colors has increased exponentially in the last century:

Crayola options from 1903 to 2010. (Courtesy of Stephen Von Worley)

With these technological advances in color identification now enabling us to break down the spectrum of possible colors down to such discrete variations, I think it's time the children's book community caught up and utilized Crayola's full compliment of colors. So look for new editions of your favorite childhood classics to be released in the near future. Now you and your children will be able to fully enjoy revitalized classics such as:

Harold and the Jazzberry Jam Crayon (Crockett Johnson)

Alien Armpit Eggs and Ham (Dr. Seuss)

Go Away Big Mountain Meadow Monster! (Ed Emberley)

Lilly's Cyber Grape Plastic Purse (Kevin Henkes)

Little Cornflower and Little Laser Lemon (Leo Lionni)

Cosmic Cobalt Berries for Sal (Robert McKloskey)

Goodnight Moon (Margaret Wise Big Foot Feet and Clement Hurd)

and my new personal favorite:

The Bittersweet Shimmer Balloon (A. LaMorisse)

By taking advantage of our technicolor age, your reading experience is no longer confined to the clumsy brushstrokes of an antiquated rainbow... finally, you can enjoy the surreal beauty of the full color spectrum and all its bizarre glory!

Now where did I put my copy of Fuzzy Gargoyle Gas Ducklings?

Here's looking at you, kid.

2010-01-26T22:26:00.002-05:00

another painting:

Dusting off the paintbrushes...

2010-01-24T15:15:00.006-05:00

Trying to rediscover my painting chops, which I've neglected for the past 10 years or so... and what better way jumpstart the process than with portraits of orangutans?

Fly By

2009-11-20T22:41:00.005-05:00

Aaron Reynolds and Neil Numberman are stopping by today for a visit to promote their clever new book, Joey Fly Private Eye. (Da-da-DAA!)

They've prepared a really cool packet of stuff to go with it... but my slow internet connection wouldn't let me load all of it (it's a conspiracy, a cover up, I tell ya!). But for now we've got a cool video...

and cutout paper dolls...

Until next time...

Taste the Rainbow

2009-11-04T20:40:00.005-05:00

A little treat for all you Rainbow Fish haters out there:

Rainbow Fish Roll
Try the most beautiful tasting fish on the menu. We've removed the famous scales, but the taste is as unique and vibrant as ever...$10.99

Kidlitosphere Conference 2009

2009-10-18T19:33:00.006-05:00

Went to the Kidlitosphere Conference on Saturday, which was luckily in my backyard this year. It was great to be surrounded by so many people who are so dedicated and passionate about children's literature... and to finally meet some of you all in person for the first time!

Big props to MotherReader for organizing the day... and for squeezing me in at the last minute!

BSB Flashback: Hippo! No Rhino!

2009-10-15T23:33:00.000-05:00

7 January 2008

The Construction of Meaning and the Self De(con)struction of Identity: A Hippo-Critical Analysis of Jeff Newman's Hippo! No, Rhino!
Rosco P. Hargrove (Class of 2010)
English 421: Re-Introduction to Literary Criticism
Professor F. R. Zismer
Final Paper
Submitted on: December 22, 2007

Plot Summary

A mischievous zookeeper decides to have some fun and puts a sign that reads "Hippo" in front of the Rhino pen. This seemingly harmless bit of mischief wreaks havoc on the rhino's psyche as passersby continually refer to the rhino as "hippo". The rhino desperately tries to correct them, but to no avail. It isn't until a little boy comes along that things change. The child sees what's going on and changes the sign back to rhino. The book ends with the zookeeper continuing his mischievous ways by putting up a new sign that reads, "Porcupin-o".

Part I: Hippo! No, Rhino! Structuralism! No, Poststructuralism!

Newman's sparse use of language is deceptive. While he uses few words in his narrative, he manages to reveal deeper linguistic issues by drawing together some of the fundamental issues and conflicts in literary criticism.

As a starting point, the basic conflict in Hippo! No, Rhino! is clearly a re-creation of the tension between the structuralist and post-structuralist schools of thought. Newman's Hippo! No, Rhino! situation is an intriguing thought exercise which forces us to reconsider a fundamental question: Where does meaning come from?

Is it from the zookeeper (filling the archetypal role of trickster-god) who creates meaning by labeling the rhino as "hippo"? Or is his semantic subversion just a silly prank?

Is it the people reading the sign who give birth to meaning by creating the link between the sign ("hippo") to the signified (the rhino)? Or are they merely dimwitted automatons who will believe anything they read?

Is there even any meaning to begin with? Who are we (or the rhino) to say that "rhino" is the correct label? Isn't the polyphonic spree of letters and sounds that make up r-h-i-n-o ultimately as arbitrary as h-i-p-p-o?

Part II: Pedagogy of the Zoopressed

If we continue to peel away layers of this onion, we eventually find ourselves alone with the tear-jerkingly tragic figure of the "rhino".

(Note: Though it is awkward, I will refer to the rhino using the pronoun "it" because Newman's text does not indicate whether the rhino is male or female.)

(Full disclosure: Upon first reading, I subconsciously assumed that the rhino was a male, which tipped my hand as an unwitting co-conspirator in the phallocentricity embedded in our male-dominated society. I would like to assure you, professor, that based on last semester's readings on feminist theory and gynocritic analysis, I am sufficiently ashamed.)

Why is the rhino a tragic figure? Not only because it is helplessly tormented by the powerful zookeeper... that is but a minor offense. The true tragedy reveals itself with further examination of the sociolinguistic context of the rhino's self-identification.

The word "rhino," being of English (Anglo-Saxon) origin is obviously not the rhino's native tongue. Yet the rhino has come to identify itself as a "rhino," as evidenced by the psychological distress caused by the hippo sign. This self-identification through the language of his oppressor (and yes, he is oppressed... he is, after all, held captive and put on display) is one of major symptoms of oppression that is revealed by postcolonial theory.

The fact that the rhino clings so passionately and desperately to the name bestowed upon him by his captors, demonstrates the powerful role that language plays in perpetuating the inequalities of established social hierarchy. Not only does he accept his given name, he challenges anyone who dare disrupt the sanctity of his moniker. How can the rhino truly free itself from oppression if it lives, breathes, and thinks in the language of its oppressor?

This also sheds new light on the character of the child. As I mentioned in the plot summary, toward the end of the book a young child comes to the rescue, changing the hippo sign back to rhino.

Upon first reading, the child appears as a saviour figure who sympathetically changes the sign to ease the "rhino's" mind. The child's innocence allows him to see beyond the ridiculous sign and recognize the psychological harm being done to the rhino. And yet...

...and yet, perhaps it is not that simple. By reverting the sign (the linguistic tool of oppression), isn't the child merely reinforcing the domination of the status quo and strengthening the establishment's vice-like grip on society? The child may have acted to ease the rhino's mind but (despite the child's benelovent intentions), in actuality he played an active role in relegating the beast to an eternity of tranquil captivity. He did not rescue the rhino, he merely made his cage stronger.

Part III: Freedom Isn't Free or All Signs Point to "No"

Newman's stimulating text leaves the reader (at least this reader) with a final burning question... Who holds the key to the rhino's freedom?

The optimist's answer would be that the key to freedom lies with the rhino itself. Unfortunately, to quote Karl Marx, "Religion is the opium of the masses and optimism is the ecstasy tablet of the self-delusional." So no, the rhino does not hold the key to his own freedom.

The real answer is much simpler and much more sobering. The key to freedom lies with: the zookeeper. (Seriously, it's on the big key ring that's clipped to his belt buckle.)

This does not bode well for the rhino. At the end of the book, the zookeeper puts up a new sign next to the rhino that reads, "Porcupin-o". In doing so, this sadistic trickster god is assuring us that the rhino's nightmare is not over... and that no amount of lit crit is going to save him from an eternity in this semiotic purgatory. The helpless rhino (like the rest of us) is forever caught in that desolate place between meaning and just plain mean.

Very Grouchy Daddy

2009-10-09T08:29:00.003-05:00

Provocative (at least in the children's lit circle) article in Slate by Daniel B. Smith railing against Eric Carle.

There comes a time in the life of a writer when he has to straighten his spine, gird his loins, and—facing the certain opprobrium of his peers and the
disdain of his friends and family—proclaim an ignored, essential verity.

Eric Carle, the most successful children's book author
of our time, sucks.

And Smith raises two classic children's book questions:

1. To what extent should the author take his adult audience into account?
2. Carle or Sendak? (A Kidslit version of Beatles or Rolling Stones)

Update: The children's literature gods have heard Smith's call and rewarded him with this: On October 8th, Jumpstart used the Very Hungry Caterpillar as it's Read for the Record book this year. The numbers are still being tallied, but there's a chance that Smith's nemesis will be enshrined in the Guinness Book of World Records...

Quote of the Day

2009-09-18T06:41:00.005-05:00

"[Art]... enhances the sense of wonder. And wonder is respect for life."

-William Steig

The Relatives Came

2009-09-16T21:34:00.001-05:00

Cynthia Rylant's classic story of an eventful family visit...

...also the title of David Sedaris's next compilation of humorous essays about an eventful family visit and the endearing dysfunction of the modern American family?

Great Lines in Children's Literature: The Composer Is Dead (Lemony Snicket)

2009-09-10T22:52:00.006-05:00

From Lemony Snicket's latest:

"Composer" is a word which here means "a person who sits in a room, muttering and humming and figuring out what notes the orchestra is going to play." This is called composing. But last night, the composer was not muttering. He was not humming. He was not moving, or even breathing.

This is called decomposing.

I would write more about the book itself, but I wouldn't feel right reviewing the book without listening to the CD that comes with it. And I didn't think the staff at Barnes and Noble would be too happy if they caught me pulling the cd out of its case, burning it onto my laptop and then uploading it onto my iPod.

Question

2009-09-07T21:23:00.003-05:00

What must the inhabitants (especially the animals) of Narnia thought of the Pevensie kids when they showed up wearing fur coats?

Horton Hears A Who (as 70's Thriller)

2009-08-31T20:28:00.008-05:00

How psyched would you be if you pulled this slim paperback off the musty shelf of a used bookstore?

From the back cover:

This taut psychological thriller from bestselling author Theodor Geisel is the second installment of his acclaimed Horton series. As the book opens, we once again find Detective Horton waking from a weeklong bender. The sun is piercing, his head is pounding in his ears, and even the dust sounds like it's talking to him. As the day goes on, Horton realizes that he can't shake the voices in his head. Horton can't tell if he is psychic or psychotic, but he follows the voices and embarks upon a mind-bending journey. His feverish dedication leads him to social ridicule, lands him in jail, and threatens to leave his sanity in tatters.

"In the bizarre tradition that includes both Dashiell Hammett and Philip K. Dick, Giesel breaks new ground." -The New Yorker

"Destined to become a cult classic." -The San Francisco Chronicle

"Beware the Sour Kangaroo." -Rolling Stone

BSB Flashback: Hop on Pop

2009-08-30T22:11:00.001-05:00

War of Words

2009-08-26T21:42:00.023-05:00

Author: Davide Cali
Illustrator: Serge Bloch

This unique book begins with a soldier in his lonely foxhole facing off against a mysterious opponent. His military-issue manual describes the enemy as dangerous and inhuman, and it is this ruthless and menacing description of the opponent that steels the soldier's resolve during combat. It is a simple matter of kill or be killed. As the war wages on, our soldier eventually sneaks into the other foxhole and discovers that his enemy may not be the monster that he was made out to be. The book ends with the two soldiers reaching out to each other, cautiously hopeful that they can end the fighting.

In April, Meghan Cox Gurdon of the Wall Street Journal had this interesting take on the book:

This book is very stylish, but it's pure propaganda: The idea is to perplex children about why war should ever happen and invite them to believe that nothing is worth fighting for -- when adults should know better.

While I'm all for healthy skepticism, I think that there is more depth here than Gurdon realizes. While the book does not hide its antiwar message, there is another message here that is a little more nuanced than War is Bad or (in Gurdon’s words) that “nothing is worth fighting for.”

In the beginning we, through the soldier's experience, think that the enemy is the other soldier, but by the end the real enemy is revealed… and he isn’t the man in the other foxhole. So the question is: if not the other soldier, who is The Enemy in this story?

This is where the underlying message of Cali's book shines through. It's clear that these two soldiers were merely being manipulated from above and that "The Enemy" in this case is the faceless figure of authority that knowingly promulgated false information in order to justify and fan the flames of war.

History is riddled with examples of governments/movements manipulating information to justify war, and the decision to go to war is too serious for us to take information at face value. Cause if you don’t dig deeper, you may end up digging your own foxhole (or worse). It's not that "nothing is worth fighting for... but in order to know that something is worth fighting for, you have to know the truth.

Bloch’s illustrations do an amazing job of reinforcing this idea that information plays a large role in war. The illustrations take on the style of political cartoons, mimicking a popular vehicle for propaganda. But more interestingly is the way Bloch uses the page itself within the illustrations.

For example, the foxholes appear as torn holes in the page. (You should CLICK HERE to see images from the book, courtesy of the lovely ladies of 7 Impossible Things Before Breakfast). The page itself is the battlefield. This interplay between the page and the image further illustrates (pun sheepishly intended) that wars are fought not just on the front lines, but on the page: through newspaper editorials, policy briefs, political cartoons… wars are waged by words as well as by bullets and bombs.

So while I, like Gurdon, sometimes raise a skeptical eyebrow at overly simplistic anti-war literature, I don’t think that this is the case in The Enemy. Rather than perplexing children about "why war should ever happen", Cali's book tries to make them realize that if war should ever happen, you better make damn sure that you aren’t being duped into it.

I thought I was going to end it there, but a little digging on the internet revealed another interesting angle.

The Enemy was originally published in association with Amnesty International Australia in 2007. The original version features a highly decorated and smiling general (with sunglasses) below large print that says "Enemy".

Before we discuss the illustration, note that this version does not have the subtitle: A Book About Peace. This is interesting because in her WSJ review, one of Gurdon's points is that,

"The Enemy: A Book About Peace," by Davide Cali, does not so much promote peace as repudiate armed conflict.

Which is a valid point and something that kind of bugged me too. But maybe it wasn't originally written as a book about peace at all. Maybe that subtitle was added on afterwards for marketing reasons. I wouldn't be surprised if US publishers were worried that a book about war would be too hard to promote, so they stuck the tagline "A Book About Peace" and switched out the diabolical general and slapped on a picture of an peacefully smiling soldier. Maybe that cover would be less likely to scare parents away.

Now let's look at the difference in the cover art. Interestingly, the smug general doesn't appear on the inside of the book at all. He remains above the fray (and outside the lines) making the decisions to send people to war. He only appears on the cover, which looks almost like a "Wanted" poster, a bold advertisement saying "This is the real enemy."

In fact, take a closer look at the illustration... it's hard to tell with this low resolution, but you can see that the general literally has blood on his hands.

So Gurdon was right about one thing: this is not a book about peace. This is a book about the horrors of war and the need to keep a close eye on those who have the power to declare it. Because it’s true: adults should know better. They should know better than to blindly accept jingoistic justifications for war without asking questions. After all, a knowledgeable public with the ability to question their leaders and hold them accountable is key to a healthy democracy. Anything that tells you otherwise is pure propaganda.

The Five Chinese Brothers: The Movie

2009-08-23T00:12:00.011-05:00

This controversial children's book classic is just begging to be adapted for the big screen... I can see it now:

Title: The Five Chinese Brothers

Tagline: If They Can’t Tell Us Apart, They Can’t Pick Us Out Of A Line-Up.

Plot: In this subversive action-adventure, five Asian-American friends, sick of people not being able to tell them apart, decide to use their anonymity to their advantage and plan the crime spree of a lifetime.

Director: Wai-keung Lau
Producer: Quentin Tarantino
Screenplay: Claire Huchet Bishop
Art Direction: Kurt Wiese

Note: In case you didn't recognize the poster, here is the original.

The Curious Garden

2009-08-19T21:39:00.012-05:00

Author/Illustrator: Peter Brown

On the surface, this quietly beautiful book is about a boy who discovers and cultivates a garden in the middle of the city. Through persistence (think The Carrot Seed on Miracle-Gro), the garden thrives and takes on a life of it’s own, slowly spreading throughout the city. More importantly, the garden inspires more gardeners, and soon the formerly drab city is blooming.

There is more than meets the eye here. If you scratch beneath the charming tale of environmental stewardship, you'll find an interesting meditation on the nature of ideas in the internet age.

In Brown's book, more important than the spreading of the garden is the spreading of the idea of gardening. Ideas are curious things indeed, and it is true that with a little persistence and cultivation, an idea has the ability to take on a life of its own. In the blink of an eye (or with the click of a mouse) an idea can spread and take root in even the tiniest crack (or niche market). If enough people pick up on the idea and are inspired by it, they will carry it themselves. Like twittering birds that spread vegetation by carrying seeds to distant lands, an idea can be spread by individuals as they fly across the internet.

Indeed, it is when other people in Brown's city get bit by the gardening bug, that the city really begins to explode. One garden by itself has limitations, but a sprawling network of people dedicated to gardening, now that is when broad social change really blossoms.

Whereas the normal term for this hyperkinetic spread of information is the vicious term to "go viral", the Curious Garden presents the phenomenon of this growth model with innocent beauty and childlike wonder. A message in The Curious Garden is that it takes a combination of sustained curiosity and innovative persistence to allow our ideas to bloom (that and a little bit of luck). The flipside of which is that the fertile garden of the imagination can easily dry up into a bleak and desolate landscape without proper care.

So, upon finishing the Curious Garden, I was left with three questions.

The first question is: What is your idea?

The second question is: Whether it is gardening, an innovative plan for universal health care, or customized bobblehead dolls, do you have the curiosity and persistence to cultivate your idea and allow it to grow?

The last question is: Do you believe in your idea enough to see it spread and possibly take on a life of its own?

Note: For a full review and a compendium of other on-line reviews, go check out (as always) A Fuse #8 Production.

Penguin Great Ideas

2009-08-18T19:08:00.009-05:00

I saw this awesome treatment of the Gettysburg Address on the Book Cover Archive Blog:

and I couldn't resist whipping up a Bottom Shelf Books addition to the Penguin Great Ideas Series:

At the Movies

2009-08-11T22:20:00.004-05:00

If you are a bit skeptical about the Where The Wild Things Are movie, maybe Maurice Sendak himself can put your mind at ease:

Unfortunately, I don't have anything that can put your mind at ease about this:

If You Give A Mouse A Dollar... He'll Rob an ATM?!

2009-08-10T17:45:00.005-05:00

Looks like that greedy little mouse is at it again:

From AOL News:

LA GRANDE, Ore. (Aug. 8) - A mouse found inside an automatic teller machine — along with a nest it had built with chewed-up $20 bills — gave an Oregon gas station employee the surprise of her life.

The mouse, discovered Thursday, had thoroughly torn up two bills and damaged another 14 to line his nest. Employee Millie Taylor said she screamed and slammed the machine's door shut.

The bank replaced all the money that wasn't extensively damaged, and the ATM has continued to work just fine. The mouse also got a reprieve: He was evicted from his nest but set free outside the station.

Other workers at the Gem Stop Chevron in La Grande in eastern Oregon say they're mystified about how the mouse got inside the machine.

Great Lines in Children's Literature: Sam, Bangs & Moonshine

2009-07-27T20:04:00.012-05:00

“Sam said her mother was a mermaid, when everyone knew she was dead.”

Sam, Bangs & Moonshine (Evaline Ness)

Now that is a great sentence. That is children's literature.

I was going to leave it at that, but then when I googled "Evaline Ness", I found out that she was married to Eliot Ness, the man who brought down Al Capone. WHAT?! Why this was never mentioned in The Untouchables?! It would have added an interesting dimension to the movie: Evaline trying to write/illustrate her children's books while dodging bullets from Capone's thugs. She could have even asked Sean Connery to proofread a draft for her. How much would you pay to hear Connery read the following passage?

"Moonshine was a mermaid-mother, a fierce lion, a chariot drawn by dragons, and certainly a baby kangaroo. It was all flummadiddle just as Bangs had told her."

Seriously, it would be worth the price of admission just to hear Connery say "flummadiddle". That would have wrapped up the Oscar for him right there.

I was always curious about Ness's choice of the word "moonshine" for the book... now, knowing her prominent role in the prohibition era, I only have more (and much more interesting) questions. Her husband was famous for his quest to enforce prohibition... yet in the book, Evaline has the line:

"There's good MOONSHINE and bad MOONSHINE," he said. "The important thing is to know the difference."

Was Evaline revealing her own moral misgivings surrounding her husband's role in the prohibition era?

Did her famous law enforcement husband share these same doubts with her behind closed doors?

Did the Ness's partake in a little moonshine themselves? Perhaps at a speakeasy called the Mermaid Mother?

Or was the book (which was printed in 1966, 20 years after her divorce from Eliot Ness) meant to be a not-so-subtle jab at her famous ex-husband?

These questions must be answered! I think it's high time the historians stepped to the plate and did some serious digging...

Kristof's Best Kids' Books EVER!!!

2009-07-06T23:02:00.007-05:00

A few good friends forwarded this column from the Sunday New York Times to me today: Nicholas Kristof, the renowned op-ed columnist for the NYT recently wrote about his favorite kids' books. It was an interesting list, but what is even more interesting is that if you look at his body of work, you can see that these childhood favorites really did have an impact on his writing career. Below are some examples:

Kristof Favorite: “Charlotte’s Web.” The story of the spider who saves her friend, the pig, is the kindest representation of an arthropod in literary history.

Related Kristof Article: "Humanity Even for Nonhumans." Writings by a Princeton scholar have popularized a movement to grant basic protections to pigs and chickens and to limit human dominion over other species.

Connection: To what extent do humans have the right to decide the fate of animals?

Kristof Favorite: “Wind in the Willows.” My mother read this 101-year-old English classic to me, and I’m still in love with the characters. Most memorable of all is Toad — rich, vain, childish and prone to wrecking cars.

Related Kristof Article: "It’s Time to Learn From Frogs." Scientists are beginning to find a connection between bizarre deformities in water animals and abnormalities in humans.

Connection: A young Kristoff learned valuable lessons in morality from a misbehaving anthropomorphized toad; scientists learn valuable lessons about humanity by studying genetically misbehaving amphibians.

Kristof Favorite: “Gentle Ben.” The coming-of-age story of a sickly, introspective Alaskan boy who makes friends with an Alaskan brown bear, to the horror of his tough, domineering father.

Related Kristof Article: "Obama, Misha and the Bear." President-elect Barack Obama needs a new approach to Russia if we want to avoid a new cold war, and we also need to get over our crush on Georgia’s president, Mikheil Saakashvili.

Connection: Coming-of-age story, of an skinny, introspective young president who attempts diplomatic relations with possibly hostile parties, to the horror of his tough, domineering predecessors.

I could go on, but I think you get the idea. The conversation continues, as Kristof invites people to list their favorites here.

A is for Angst

2009-06-11T22:17:00.007-05:00

I saw this book by Joost Ellfers and was immediately reminded of Miranda July's 2008 bestselling book of short stories: No One Belong Here More Than You.

Upon further inspection, the two books are actually very similar, deftly mixing heavy doses insecurity and angst with hints of charm and quirk. I thought it was just a coincidence until I saw this picture of July:

The resemblance is uncanny. Could there be a secret Joost-July alliance that we're not aware of? If not, should we request one?

"Not My Problem"

2009-06-10T22:25:00.006-05:00

You may have seen this already, but the Onion A.V. Club has an interesting breakdown of the DVD commentary accompanying the garish trainwreck/nightmare that was the Cat In the Hat movie (which is nice, since no one in their right mind would by the DVD, let alone sit through the commentary).

The article highlights this revealing quote from the director Bo Welch:

"See, we addressed the book—at least the cover and the back cover. What happens in between there is not my problem."

Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Twitter

2009-06-06T19:03:00.006-05:00

So, I decided to try giving this twitter thing a whirl... and after playing around with it, I thought... you know who Twitter would be a good format for? Alexander from Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day! (Judith Viorst and Ray Cruz). I can just imagine Alexander, moping around all day, typing in disgruntled updates on his iPhone...

AlexanderNoGood teacher just said i sing too loud. :(

AlexanderNoGood @ school, Mrs. Dickens liked Paul's pic of boat better than my invisible castle.

AlexanderNoGood I can tell this is going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

AlexanderNoGood In carpool: becky, audrey, + elliot got window seats. I was scrunched, smushed, and car sick.

AlexanderNoGood i found cereal in my cereal. :( think i'll move to Australia.

AlexanderNoGood @ breakfast: Anthony found Corvette Sting Ray kit in cereal. Nick found Jr. Undercover Agent code ring in cereal.

AlexanderNoGood I can tell this is going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

You get the idea. If you want to check out his twitter page and see running proof that it was indeed a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. (and here's a link to mine, which will--hopefully--be less of a downer.)

Cloudy No More!

2009-05-19T20:17:00.005-05:00

A while ago, I posted about Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs, pointing out some of the delightfully bizarre illustrations, one of which was what appeared to be baby heads stuck to the front of a garbage truck.

Well, Ron Barrett left a comment setting the record straight:

"I illustrated this book. To clarify the heads: sanitation workers in New York City find dolls in the trash place the heads on the the rods at the front corners of their trucks which they use to navigate through tight spots. One can also see teddy bears on the radiator grills. What the reader sees is the work of playful garbagemen, not sadistic maniacs."

So, there you have it! Mystery solved! Thanks, Ron!

Note: In case Mr. Barrett is reading again, I didn't actually think that the garbagemen were sadistic maniacs--or that the town of Chewandswallow was a brutal totalitarian regime... :)

Miss Nelson Is Missing: The Movie

2009-05-13T22:02:00.010-05:00

Cause it's only a matter of time, right?

IMDB entry

User rating: 6.5/10

Director: Clint Eastwood
Writer: Henry Allard
Artistic Director: James Marshall

Genre: Mystery/Thriller

Tagline: "Their teacher is missing... and they have no one to blame but themselves."

Plot: When their teacher (Drew Barrymore) mysteriously disappears, the students (led by Dakota Fanning and Bobb'e J. Thompson) enlist the help of a hapless detective (Seth Rogan) to track her down.

In the Night Kitchen

2009-05-05T21:07:00.009-05:00

Maurice Sendak's classic In the Night Kitchen, re-released as a memoir:

From Publisher's Weekly: Bourdain's latest behind-the-scenes memoir is another no-holds-barred adventure into the surreal underbelly of the restaurant industry. And never one to shy away from controversy, the rebellious Bourdain writes with two objectives in mind: shock and awe. There is one particularly bizarre scene involving full frontal nudity and getting "baked" in the kitchen that is sure to cause a stir among those with a more sensitive palette... but the rest of us should settle in for the meal of a lifetime. With Bourdain and Sendak in the night kitchen, you're guaranteed to have your cake and eat it too.

Little Mole In Action (Figure)

2009-05-04T20:16:00.002-05:00

The Story of the Little Mole in Search of Whodunnit has inspired the creative bunch over at Live 'n Learn to make their very own Little Mole action figure... how cool is that? They should get in touch with Holzwarth and Erlbruch to produce a whole line of these babies... throw in some creative use of tootsie rolls and you've got hours of zany educational fun!

One more for good luck

2009-05-01T02:30:00.005-05:00

From the Unnecessary Sequels cutting room floor, here is another honorable mention for your viewing pleasure. I was playing around with this idea while the judges were deliberating, but didn't actually finish it... thought you all might get a kick out of it anyway. This one is also courtesy of the unstoppable Kate Coombs:

The Very Bulimic Caterpillar: Caterpillars aren't supposed to be fat because fatness is unattractive, also it's unhealthy. One little caterpillar learns an important lesson in this colorful picture book about what to do if you feel waaaay too full!

That's All, Folks!

2009-04-26T22:30:00.008-05:00

All good things must come to an end... and the Unnecessary Children's Book Sequels That Never Were is now over (and I hope you thought it was good while it lasted!). Farida has a nice two part round-up of the submissions (Part I and Part II) that didn't get illustrated, but were hilarious nonetheless. Truth is, I would have tried to illustrate them all if I had the time, and I may still work up another one here and there if I get a chance. But it was a lot of fun, thanks everyone and maybe we'll do this again soon!

Here is a quick round-up of the results:

First Place: Harry and the Can of Purple Spray Paint (Kate Coombs)

Second Place: The Very Hungry Larva (Elaine Magliaro)

Third Place: Kitty's First Meteor Hurtling On A Terrifying Death Path Toward Earth (Hannah Mahoney)

And some of the Honorable Mentions:

Unnecessary Sequel First Place Winner: Harry and the Can of Purple Spray Paint

2009-04-24T00:35:00.004-05:00

Finally, the moment you've all been waiting for... First place in Saints and Spinners' Unnecessary Children's Book Sequels That Never Were Contest goes to Kate Coombs with her unnecessary sequel to Crockett Johnson's masterpiece, Harold and the Purple Crayon:

Harry and the Can of Purple Spray Paint: Whatever you do, don't call him Harold. He's a big boy now, and he wields a mean can of spray paint! Follow Harry up and down dirty alleys and streets, also beneath overpasses, in this touching sequel. Remember: when you see that magical purple tag, an H with a skull-handled dagger slashing through it, you know Harry's been there and left his mark. -Kate Coombs

So there you have it! Congratulations, Kate!

And a big thanks to everyone who submitted their awesome suggestions... and thank you Melangell and Phil for judging and of course, thank you Farida for thinking up and organizing the contest!

Unnecessary Sequels: More Honorable Mentions

2009-04-23T00:35:00.002-05:00

The Unnecessary Children's Book Sequels That Never Were Contest had a whole bunch of fun submissions that played on Shel Silverstein's The Giving Tree, so it had to make it as an honorable mention:

The Taking Tree: Shel Silverstein's sequel to The Giving Tree proves to be much less popular, as children everywhere shun trees for fear of grabby branches and thieving twigs, and parents complain about the bad morals being conveyed to their impressionable tots. Book rated highly with test audiences, but it was later revealed that test audience consisted mainly of rhododendrons. -a.fortis, Finding Wonderland

The Tree: Co-dependent No More!: A burst of insight leads the formerly Giving Tree to shed its unhealthy relationship with The Boy as it sprouts a new branch from the stump it has become. -MotherReader

Counting Rings: A Very Special Crime Scene Investigation of 'The Giving Tree': Using the current DSM-V (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders), "Counting Rings: A Very Special Crime Scene Investigation of 'The Giving Tree'" breaks down, in a child-friendly counting-book way, the psychoses and delusions behind your child's first - and favorite - dysfunctional relationship. -Lee Wind
http://www.leewind.org

The Irate Stump: The Giving Tree has a few regrets . . . -Jamie Michalak

The Trading Tree: The story of a cunning tree which, starting with the offer of an apple for allowance, slowly trades a young boy out of his considerable inheritance over the course of his life, leaving him with nothing but a place to sit. -Tony Dowler (not an official entry, since he's a relation...)

And one more for good measure--the unnecessary sequel to Bread and Jam For Frances:

Brie and Foie Gras For Frances: After spending a month-long summer vacation in Paris with her parents and younger sister, Frances returns home and refuses to eat anything other than brie cheese and foie gras imported from France. -Elaine Magliaro

That's it for now. Remember to check in with Saints and Spinners on Friday to see who got first place in the contest!

p.s. there are a ton of other honorable mention worthy submissions that I hope to get too in time... unfortunately, if I spend any more time on photoshop my eyes might pop out of my skull and/or my wife might stuff my laptop down the garbage disposal (with good reason).

Unnecessary Sequels Second Place Winner: The Very Hungry Larva (or Moth Madness)

2009-04-22T00:30:00.004-05:00

Second Place in the Unnecessary Children's Book Sequels That Never Were Contest goes to Elaine Magliaro of Wild Rose Reader and her sequel to Eric Carle's The Very Hungry Caterpiller:

The Very Hungry Larva or Moth Madness: This is the tale of a "mad about plaid" caterpillar that eats his way through all the heirloom tartans in a Scottish castle. The larva is finally caught and "kilt" by a wild and woolly sheep shearer and his weaver wife who live on the banks of Loch Lamb. -Elaine Magliaro

Congratulations Elaine, and thanks for the great suggestion! 1st Place (and maybe a few more honorable mentions) will continue to rollout during the rest of the week. Check in with Saints and Spinners for all the details!

Note: Contest judges were the worldy and wise Melangell and Phil. Thanks guys!

Unnecessary Sequel Honorable Mention: Wet Dog, Wet Dog, What Do You Smell?

2009-04-21T00:05:00.010-05:00

Tomorrow, Saints and Spinners will announce the 2nd Place Winner in the Unnecessary Children's Book Sequels Contest. Until then, here is another Honorable Mention via a submission from Yat-Yee (and not just because she asked nicely... though she did):

An unnecessary addition to Eric Carle's iconic Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See? series: Wet Dog, Wet Dog, What Do You Smell?

...or if you want one of Penguin's newer/edgier designs, try the Penguin UK Modern Classics version:

That's it for now! (Hope that didn't gross you out too much!)
Remember to check in tomorrow at Saints and Spinners to find out who is the second place winner of the Unnecessary Children' Book Sequels That Never Were Contest!

Unnecessary Sequel Third Place Winner: Kitty’s First Meteor Hurtling on a Terrifying Death Path Toward Earth

2009-04-20T00:00:00.013-05:00

Third Place in the Unnecessary Children's Book Sequels That Never Were Contest goes to Hannah Mahoney with her sequel to Kevin Henkes' modern classic, Kitten's First Full Moon:

Kitty’s First Meteor Hurtling on a Terrifying Death Path Toward Earth: Henkes goes for the dark side in the sequel to Kitten’s First Full Moon. Please note that scenes of worldwide panic and of the apocalyptic destruction of the eastern seaboard may not be appropriate for the very youngest readers. -Hannah Mahoney (Copy Manager, Candlewick Press)

And then of course (as with all successful children's books these days), comes the blockbuster movie adaptation:

Congratulations Hannah, and thanks for your winning submission! 2nd and 1st Place (along with more honorable mentions) will be coming up throughout the week. Check in with Saints and Spinners for all the details!

Note: Contest judges were the eminent Melangell and Phil. Thanks guys!

Unnecessary Sequel Honorable Mention: Where The Wild Things Aren't

2009-04-19T09:51:00.010-05:00

The wise judges (Melangell and Phil) have spoken! Check in with Saints and Spinners tomorrow (Monday) as she unveils the results. She will announce the winners and I will post the illustrations here. In the meantime, there were a lot of great submissions for a sequel to Where The Wild Things Are, so I was compelled to make one:

Thanks to everyone for their creative suggestions, and stay tuned for more throughout the week!

Where the Wild Things Aren't: a loving commentary on boredom and conformity. -Greg W.

Where the Wild Things Aren't: After seeing his pediatrician and a child psychologist, max is prescribed medication for his anger management issues and night terrors. -Rocco Staino and Cynthia Sandler

Where the Wild Things Are Having a Bash: Max grows up and leaves home for Carousal State College--the biggest party school in the country. There, he meets other "wild things" and sails off with them into drunken oblivion every weekend. Of course, when he sobers up on Monday mornings, his Friday night dinners are always cold and moldy. -Elaine Magliaro

Where the Wild Things Aren't: Max grows up, becomes an accountant, marries the nice Jewish girl next door and spends the rest of his life in painful anonymity. -The Library Lady

Wild Things: A Tropical Theme Park: This picture book is a story about an important industry called tourism. In it, we welcome you to a tropical paradise reached by some pretty clever chronological sailing. See our monsters in their very specially designed habitat and later you can even watch a trained monster show while sipping on banana daiquiris as the sun sets over the ocean. Written and developed by Imperial Corporate, Inc. just for you. -Kate Coombs

The Paper Bag Princess

2009-04-15T23:20:00.017-05:00

Author: Robert Munsch
Illustrator: Michael Martchenko

The moral of The Paper Bag Princess is a welcome and subversive take on your standard fairy tale fare. A pretty princess loses her clothes and realizes in the end that she doesn't need all those pretty clothes to be a princess. She emerges stronger, more independent, and wielding a new vision of femininity that serves her well as she battles dragons, close-minded boyfriends, and the wedding industry.

Unfortunately, I think the message of this book may have been too subtle because the moral seems to have been lost on some of our modern day princesses. Whereas the original Paper Bag Princess shed her clothes in a bold act of defiance, bravely discarding the trappings and confines of traditional femininity, today's female royalty are shedding their clothes for an entirely different reason.

The phenomenon was thoroughly examined in Ariel Levy's Female Chauvinist Pigs: Women and the Rise of Raunch Culture, and will be further explored in Almeta Grayson's new book Paper Bag Princess, which profiles the disturbing trend of sexual exploitation as a route to fame. (exhibit A: Paris Hilton; exhibit B: Kim Kardashian).

From Publishers Weekly: "These sobering portraits force the reader to question a society that not only encourages this brand of sexploitation, but rewards it with prime time TV deals and endless magazine covers. A well-balanced but jarring social critique, Paper Bag Princess will change the way you watch TV... and how you see the world."

Note: This started out as a standard satirical post, but I have to admit that I am legitimately disturbed by this. Maybe it's because I'm getting to the age where the idea of fatherhood is not just a distant and abstract concept, but I consistently find myself flipping through the TV saying to myself (or my wife), "Our children will not watch TV. We are moving to a remote cabin in the woods where E! cannot find us." Call me a prude, but the idea of raising a daughter in a world where sex tapes are a legitimate path to stardom scares the sh!t out of me.

A Lighter Note: For a more thorough discussion of the actual Paper Bag Princess, see Fuse #8's profile of the book, which came in at #70 in her Top 100 Picture Books List.

Unnecessary Children's Book Sequels Contest - Honorable Mention: I Am Still A Bunny

2009-04-15T08:24:00.025-05:00

While the winners of the contest are still being determined, here is something to give you a taste of the Unnecessary Children's Book Sequels Contest results. This is a great entry that didn't quite make the final cut, but I couldn't resist making a cover for it. This one is a sequel to the classic I Am A Bunny and comes courtesy of Charlotte of Charlotte's Library:

"I Am Still a Bunny" by Ole Risom.

We've already spent one fun-filled year with Nicholas the Bunny. Now the cute rabbit takes another trip through the seasons, in which he continues to be a passive, isolated observer of the pagent of life. "In spring, I watch other animals making friends." Children will be comforted by the fact that flowers still bloom, leaves still fall, and Nicholas is still watching them.

In case the resolution is not clear enough for you to read the quote at the top, it says:

"A devastating meditation on the nature of passivity in a society obsessed with hyper-engagement. If only we could all still be bunnies."
-Jonathan Franzen, author of How To Be Alone

Thank you, Charlotte for that awesome suggestion! Stay tuned for more soon...

Note: Not all of the contest illustrations will be children's books re-imagined as books for grown-ups... but I reserve the right to scratch that book design review itch when necessary.

Bottom Shelf Books Redesigned: Goodnight Moon

2009-04-14T22:04:00.000-05:00

While prepping for the Unnecessary Picture Book Sequels Contest (the results of which we will begin revealing any day now), I remembered a feature that I'd been wanting to do for a while: Redesigning classic picture book titles as grown-up novels. I think it's because I've spent too much time stalking Book Design Review and other such sites that appeal to an amateur dork like me.

So here is the first installment... Goodnight Moon redesigned as a noir-ish novel:

Wild Rumpus At The White House

2009-04-14T10:50:00.005-05:00

Last Day!

2009-04-10T08:19:00.003-05:00

Today is the last day for submission to the Unneccessary Children's Book Sequels That Never Were Contest over at Saints and Spinners. GO! GO! GO!!

Everyone Poops Trailer

2009-04-09T07:59:00.006-05:00

My friend Karin sent me this... the perfect way to jumpstart an otherwise lethargic Thursday morning!

p.s.: I realize that there have been an inordinate number of posts about poop lately. I can't explain it, but I am doing my best to rectify the situation. (no pun intended.)

Unnecessary Sequels Contest Still Going Strong!

2009-04-06T07:38:00.005-05:00

The Unneccessary Children's Book Sequels That Never Were Contest over at Saints and Spinners is still going strong! You've got until Friday to submit your winning entry. Go to Farida's site to see all the rules, but basically, submit your entry and judges will choose the top three submissions. I will then attempt to illustrate or photoshop-ustrate the winning entries for your viewing pleasure. Winners get their choice of prizes!

So think hard about your favorite children's books (or if you need to jog your memory, check out Fuse #8's definitive list of Top 100 Picture Books) and imagine the bizarre and unnecessary directions that they may lead...

To get you primed, last week we brought you the delightfully squirm-inducing Millions of Rats (see above). We've gotten some really good responses so far, so too keep the momentum going here is another unnecessary sequel--the follow up to Leo Lionni's heartwarming classic Alexander and the Wind-Up Mouse... Alexander and the Logitech MX610 Wireless Laser Mouse!

From the press release that never was:

"In a bold new joint venture to promote cross-industrial synergy, the Lionni estate has partnered with industry leader Logitech to launch a new series of children's books that will teach children about the importance of compassion, the beauty of friendship, and the advantages of the cutting-edge technology that only Logitech products can provide. Now available at your local Best Buy. "

Now go join in on the fun and GIVE US YOUR BEST SHOT!

Jellybeans

2009-04-02T13:51:00.013-05:00

For those of you who have ever wanted to win that prized jar of jellybeans, you have to CHECK THIS OUT. My uber-talented friend Oliver Uberti is a Design Editor for National Geographic (a.k.a the Dream Job) and put this mind games blogpost together.

And using his prescribed method of estimation, I came within 100 jelly beans of the correct answer! Hot Diggigity Donuts! Now if I could only travel back in time to the third grade...

Also, be sure to check out Oliver's website. He gives you an insider's look at the thought processes behind the pages of National Geographic, which (if you're a dork like me) is like freakin' candy (a giant jar of jelly beans, if you will).

Contest Time!

2009-03-31T21:44:00.012-05:00

[Note: This is not an April Fool's Day gag.]

My buddy Farida over at Saints & Spinners came up with the idea to have a great contest and asked if I wanted get in on the action. My immediate answer was "Yeah!"... and then after giving it some thought, my answer was "Heck Yeah!"

The contest is called Unnecessary Children’s Book Sequels That Never Were (a spin-off of her awesome feature: Children's Books That Never Were).

So go over there and CHECK IT OUT and get your creative juices flowing! You have until April 10th. If you come up with one of the three winning entries, I will do my best to illustrate (or photoshop-ustrate) it!

Plus, the winners will get their choice of prizes... an awesome homemade doll/action figure (a Farida original), a Jim Henson dvd, or this random painting of a robot!

One True Sentence

2009-03-29T21:03:00.006-05:00

In A Moveable Feast, Hemingway talks about the life of a writer, saying that "All you have to do is write one true sentence. Write the truest sentence you know."

I wonder if Dr. Charlotte Cowan had this in mind while writing "The Moose With Loose Poops". How else could she construct a sentence as devastatingly honest as:

"A waterfall's coming out of my bottom!"

Yikes! Forget the truth! and forget you, Hemingway!
I don't want the truth! I can't handle the truth!

Bottom Shelf Quiz

2009-03-25T08:32:00.014-05:00

One of the following is an award winning children's book. The other seven are all part of the collected fictions of Jorge Luis Borges. Can you spot the children's book?

a) The Improbable Impostor Tom Castro
b) The Widow Ching - Pirate
c) Man on Pink Corner
d) The Two Kings and the Two Labyrinths
e) Hakim, the Masked Dyer of Merv
f) The Garden of Abdul Gasazi
g) The Night of the Gifts
h) The Approach to Al-Mu'tasim

To see if you're correct, click here.

(Though, if you read the book you'll see that it's very possible that it was stolen from Borges... either that or Borges snuck in through a window at night and whispered the story into the author's sleeping ear.)

The Story of the Little Mole Who Went In Search of Whodunnit

2009-03-24T19:14:00.009-05:00

Authors: Werner Holzarth and Wolf Ehrlbruch

The children's book industry has always niche for books dealing with bodily functions, but if you want some mystery and intrigue mixed in with your scatalogical humor, Holzarth and Ehrlbruch have the book for you.

The story is simple: a mole emerges from his slumber and gets shat on (talk about a case of the mondays). The indignant mole goes on an (understandably) indignant rampage interrogating every being he comes across in an attempt to find the culprit. The entire time, he still has the poop on his head, which makes him look kind of like a character from Grease.

During each interrogation, he asks if the poops belongs to them and each character proves their innocence by (enthusiastically) providing proof by showing their own (much different looking) poop as evidence. And believe you me, the evidence is overwhelming. Not even the crew from CSI could find fault with these steaming samples of innocence.

(Note: The book was rereleased as The Story of the Little Mole Who Knew It Was None of His Business: The Plop Up Edition! that allows the children to join in on the fun... one can only hope that the book stirs your child's respect for scientific inquiry and does not result in a general fondness for playing with poop.)

This story teaches a lesson that is particularly valuable during these harsh times. It seems like every morning we wake up to some new piece of crappy news. The mole provides us with new model of heroism by teaching us not to take this shit sitting down. When the world gives you crap, you find out whodunnit and demand retribution.

Spolier Alert: In an unexpected plot twist, it turns out that the culprit was... Bob Dylan. The Malibu Police Department has joined the Mole in his quest for justice.

Musical Note: I think I might have just found the perfect soundtrack for The Story of the Little Mole Who Knew It Was None of His Business: The Movie. (In High Definition 3D of course.)

So take a second to imagine... the mole wakes up, gets shat on and takes off to the tune of Mississippi John Hurt singing "Nobody's Dirty Business". Can you say Instant Classic?

Tagged!

2009-02-18T21:25:00.005-05:00

Kate Coombs, prolific children's book writer and blogger over at Book Aunt, tagged me a while back giving me the award for Most Obscurely Hilarious. And I honestly don't think I could think of a more flattering award. (Take that, Demitri Martin!)

Unfortunately, I thought it was freeze tag and have been standing frozen in time for the past few months, which explains why I haven't been writing at all... that's my excuse and I'm sticking to it.

Or... was it that I thought Obsurely Hilarious meant that it would be hilarious to vanish into obscurity? Yeah, that's it. That's my excuse and I'm sticking to that.

Point is: Thanks, Kate!

Petunia: A Cautionary Tale for the Modern Jackass

2008-11-16T19:41:00.010-05:00

Author/Illustrator: Roger Duvoisin

Modern Jackass (n.): a person that talks expertly about something he/she actually knows very little or nothing about.

Modern Jackass is a term that was recently made popular by nasally heartthrob and king of geeks, Ira Glass. It gained traction with a This American Life episode dedicated to the modern condition of speaking at length and with confidence on topics that you are not qualified talk about, let alone pontificate on.

(Disclosure: I didn't listen to that particular show, so my talking about the show without actually listening to it is in itself an example of Modern Jackass-ism. Does that blow your mind?)

This phenomenon seems somewhat unavoidable in today's society due to two pervasive issues:

1) The overwhelming availability of information and the constant barrage of stimulus has rendered the modern mind virtually paralyzed by Attention Deficit Disorder. (Seriously, there are times when I can barely read a paragraph without a commercial break.) As a society populated by minds that flutter and flit about like hummingbirds on crack, it's a minor miracle that any of us know anything.

2) Information flows so quickly and the news cycle spins at such a furious pace that it takes an obsessive nature of almost maniacal proportions just to keep up with the ever shifting nuances of any issue. This was most obvious during the presidential campaign, when breaking news in the morning was already yesterday's news by lunchtime (which was bad for the real yesterday's news which had already become ancient history). Given the speed at which we operate nowadays, you get the feeling that just blinking means you've fallen behind... and possibly into jackass territory.

While these conditions make Modern Jackass-ism seem like a new phenomenon, we all know that talking out of line has been around since the beginning of time. It was captured perfectly by Roger Duvoisin in seminal work on the matter: Petunia.

First published in 1950 (well before Ira Glass was born and waaaay before he ever donned his first pair of hipster-intellectual glasses), Petunia is the story of a silly goose who gets her wings on a book and thinks that automatically makes her wise. The other barnyard animals, seeing her walk around with her proud head held high in the air and a book in her arms, also think that she must be wise... so they ask her for advice. Petunia gladly gives her ill-advice, and eventually Petunia's pride and false wisdom ends up blowing up in all their faces (quite literally).

As this classic children's book shows, speaking out when you don't know what you're talking about is nothing particularly new. Whether you call it Modern Jackass or the Petunia Syndrome, at the end of the day we're all just a bunch of old-fashioned dumbasses.

Tagged!

2008-11-12T21:27:00.024-05:00

A while back, children's book guru and readiologist extraordinaire Esme Raji Codell of Planet Esme was kind enough to tag my delinquent self with the I Heart Your Blog honor. Woohoo--thanks Esme!

(Note: Thanks to my much more observant wife, I just made the connection that Esme is the Esme from Educating Esme: Diary of a Teacher's First Year... a great book about teaching which I read back in 2001. Holy crap! As someone who works in education, consider me doubly honored!)

Now the rules of the game say that the blogs I tap are supposed to:

1) Add the logo of the award to your blog
2) Add a link to the person who awarded it to you
3) Nominate at least 7 other blogs
4) Add links to those blogs on your blog
5) Leave a message for your nominees on their blogs!

HOWEVER, I realize this is late in the game and some of you may have already been tagged. So in case you've been previously hearted, I'm offering several alternative options. Here's the deal: do any of the following things and consider yourself exempt your from the rules above!

1) Draw a heart on your palm, go up to one person and say "Stop! In the Name of Love!"
2) Send me a definition of the made up word: Boomdalpiferous.
3) Next time you walk through a revolving door, go around twice.
4) Link to Bottom Shelf Books, but with the words "Tina Fey's Super Secret Crush".
5) Perform open heart surgery.

Deal? Now, without further ado and in no particular order, 7 children's lit blogs that I'm glad exist:

Seven Impossible Things Before Breakfast: Like the storm in the Wizard of Oz, the ladies at 7-Imp hit your dull world like a tornado and suddenly the whole world is more colorful... if also disturbingly surreal and with the occasional flying monkey attack.

Saints & Spinners: Kid's books, Photoshop chops & guitar tabs... what else could you want? Also, I've said it before and I'll say it again, her Children's Books That Never Were feature is pure genius and I still don't forgive her for thinking of it first.

Finding Wonderland: Because in addition to being generally awesome, the names AquaFortis & TadMack sounds like something that would be on Cartoon Network after dark. The most potent duo this side of Macaroni & Cheese.

MotherReader: Sprinkling her insightful posts with hilarious rants, the occasional naughty word, and adventures in politics, she is one bad ass mother. (p.s. hell yeah, VA!)

A Fuse #8 Production: There's a saying, "If someone says they love movies, but they haven't seen any Hitchcock... then they don't really love movies." By that same token, If someone says they love children's literature, but haven't read A Fuse #8 Production... then they don't like really love children's literature.

The Jarrett Krosoczka and Maxwell Eaton III blogs: Because they are both fun blogs that let us into the minds of some hip kickass authors... and also because when I was just getting started these author dudes were down for some goofy spoofy interviews. (Plus: Jarrett and I shared drinks once and Max and I share a birthday. So there.)

Of course there are many others, but the rules say seven, so I'm stopping at seven.

Oh, and one last thing: Tina Fey's Super Secret Crush.

BSB Flashback: I Love You Like Crazy Cakes

2008-10-20T22:26:00.000-05:00

29 March 2007

Author: Rose A. Lewis
Illustrator: Jane Dyer

This lovely story about international adoption (along with 50 Cent's immortal lyric, "I love you like a fat kid loves cake") made cake a universally accepted unit of measurement for love. (e.g. "With her latest adoption, Angelina Jolie has proven to have over a million crazy cakes worth of love to give." or "Madonna found herself in a crazy cake's worth of trouble with the international community when she circumvented the law in an attempt to adopt a baby from Malawi.")

However, like roses, different cakes signify different kinds of love... so interpretation can get tricky. According to Lewis's book, "crazy cakes" are used to measure the amount of love between a mother and her adopted baby--but what about other cakes? As a public service, I've included a rudimentary glossary below to help you decipher the messages hidden in those convoluted and calorie-laden love notes. Good luck!

Birthday Cake: Even though you're getting older, I'm still here. I guess that means I love you.

Birthday Cake (with a hidden file inside): I love you, but not enough to wait for parole, so you can either escape from prison or begin cultivating that special friendship with your cellmate.

Birthday Cake (with a hidden stripper inside): Yes, there is a God.

Bundt Cake: I love you, but I feel like something is missing... for starters: a tolerable personality, a basic understanding of good hygiene, and any legitimate job prospects that don't involve some godawful incarnation of Dungeons and Dragons. Plus, you're just not attractive enough for me. So, I guess I was wrong... I don't love you. Give me back my cake.

Cupcake: I don't love you quite enough to bake you a full-sized cake.

Cupcake (with pink frosting and sprinkles): I luv u, and if u luv me back, tell Ryan at lunch so he can tell Jessica, who will tell me, and then I'll meet u by my locker after 5th period!!! TTYL!!!! ;)

Ice Cream Cake: I love you like a friend... kind of like how I love my DVD collection.

Rice Cake: My love may be bland and unsatisfying, but I guarantee that it will not harm you in any way, shape, or form.

Rice Cake (caramel flavored): I can change, I swear! I don't have to be boring! I can take salsa lessons! I'll start gelling my hair! I can--oh, who am I kidding? I give up. I'm going home to play x-box.

Vegan Sugarless Carrot Cake: I am morally opposed to enjoying life. Yes, that includes love. Don't touch me.

Wedding Cake: I love you with all of my heart. Let's spend the rest of our lives together and eventually stop having sex.

Live From the Bottom Shelf: Jeff Newman

2008-10-09T14:54:00.018-05:00

The cool thing about writing random posts about children's books is that you sometimes you get responses from the author. That was the case with Jeff Newman, who emailed me after reading my post on Hippo! No, Rhino! Ever opportunistic, I took that opportunity to ask him for an interview. Over the next few months I fed him a steady dose of a question a month. (I was in the middle of getting ready for the wedding, so I was terrible on email. Luckily, Jeff was just coming off his own wedding, so he was understanding and accomodating. Phew! and Congrats!)

But enough from me. Without further ado, I give you:

Jeff Newman

Question 1: When did you decide to pursue a career as a children's book author?

Well, I'm still not sure, with the number of books that I've produced since I started working in the industry in 2000, I could call this a career:) But to answer your question, I decided to pursue a career in children's books when someone agreed to publish one of mine! During my sophomore year of college, I took a picture book illustration class and a children's literature class, concurrently (in the latter, I wrote the story for Reginald, my first published book, and in the former I created the dummy for the same story). But I wasn't entirely sure if that was the route I wanted to take. I had a hard time deciding what to do, because I wanted to try everything (editorial, comics, animation). Then, after college, my girlfriend at the time, also an aspiring illustrator, got a job as an assistant to the art director at Random House Children's Books, so we moved to New York in the summer of 2000. She came home from work one day and told me that she'd taken my dummy for Reginald into Random House, and had shown it to some of the editorial staff.

A week or two later, I met with an editor for Doubleday, and we were on our way to turning it into a real, live book. I've been making books (albeit slowly), ever since. So, I never really decided to pursue this as a career--it just kind of happened. And I'm incredibly lucky that it did. I've always been driven to create, but the business and promotion angle of the illustration continues to make me uncomfortable. Thankfully, I've got an agent, now, so I don't have to deal with the business aspect quite so much.

Question 2: Since Hippo! No Rhino! isn't exactly your conventional kid's book, did you have any trouble convincing the editors to go for it?

Not really; I mean, I did submit Hippo! to about three or four different publishers before it was accepted at Little, Brown. But that seems like a pretty low number, compared to other submissions stories that I've heard, especially since, as you point out, it's not a conventional kid's book. Those editors that showed some interest in the book, but ultimately turned it down, unanimously thought that the story needed to be "fleshed out". I felt strongly that it wasn't so much a story as an incident, and that it said everything I wanted it to say in that format. Luckily, the dummy made it into the hands of my editor, Alvina Ling, so I never had to discover what "fleshed out" meant. I'm pretty sure it would have involved adding more words, and maybe changing the title to Quiet, Little Rhino, or something like that.

After Hippo! arrived at Little, Brown, and all the way up through its publication, I never had any trouble convincing Alvina to go for it. I didn't have to, because we were on the same page from the get-go. If there was any doubt regarding the book's direction, I never heard about it. I just made the book I wanted to make, and I realize, especially now, how rare an opportunity that is. She protected it all the way.

Question 3: As a children's author, do you ever feel the need to self-censor yourself in your daily life? Or rather, do children's authors need to maintain a squeaky clean image in order to get published? (Note: I do not consider Madonna to be a children's book author.)

The funny thing about Madonna is, she's probably one of the few celebrities who (at least I get the sense) wrote her own stories because she actually believed she had good stories to tell. I'm probably being naive; she may have had a ton of help. But I read The English Roses, and I got the feeling that it was copied directly from Madonna's notepad, without any editor interference. That might explain why it's so damn long, and why it sounds better when you read it with a fake British accent. So what I'm saying is, you might actually enjoy it.

And since we're talking Madonna, the answer to your second question is no. Whether or not you consider Madonna an author on the grounds that what she makes is of dubious quality, technically, she is. That said, she's Madonna, and her reputation has (arguably) almost everything to do with her getting books published. But for the average author, I think that the books speak for themselves; whether you're "squeaky clean" or not only matters insomuch as you don't do a line of cocaine off of a publisher's desk when you first meet them, or get up in front of a group of kids and scream "f__k!"

Still, (and this is an answer to your first question) I do feel the pressure to self-censor from time to time, and it's almost always in the presence of other children's authors, editors, and various industry folk that I don't know especially well (especially librarians, for some reason). And part of it is just because I produce material for children, and providers of that material are under more scrutiny than those that make stuff for adults. Also, you never know who you're talking to. Is that author just a guy like yourself, writing (hopefully) funny stories for kids, or is it a behavioral psychologist that will make you feel ashamed for showing an older brother picking on a younger brother in one of your books, without showing some kind of terrible consequence for the older brother's actions, or someone that blushes when you say "oh my god" rather than "oh my gosh"? There are so many different levels of concern for the effects books (and by extension, their authors) are going to have on children (I'd be at a pretty low level, I guess), and I feel like they're all out there, personified. I'm probably just paranoid.

Thankfully, in my daily life, I don't interact with a lot of people that know I'm a children's author, besides close friends and family, and they definitely don't hold me to any moral standard (aside from expecting me not commiting a felony, maybe).

(Interviewers note: I apologize--I didn't mean to imply that Madonna was not a children's book author... I meant to imply that including her in the ranks of children's authors when considering moral behavior would be difficult because, I assume, she's an outlier. Though rumor is that Margaret Wise Brown was quite the wild child. But I digress.)

Question 4: So, assuming you can resist the temptation to commit a felony (and don't come down with a sudden case of Turret's Syndrome), do you have any other projects coming down the pipeline that we should be watching out for?

Yes, I do have a few books in the works. The first one, the one that I've been working on for just about two years (!) is called The Boys, and it was going to come out next summer, but now it's been pushed to summer '10. It's a book that has some association with baseball, so it was decided that it needs to be released during the baseball season. And I agree, it just bums me out that I have to wait that long to see it in print. The reason it got bumped from the '09 season is threefold: the first reason is because I suck at using a paintbrush, and all the "outlines" in The Boys are brushed rather than inked (maybe one of the best/worst ideas ever). The second reason is because the page count was upped to 40 pages from 32 (I still have a few pages left to do, in fact), and the reason for that is the third reason it was delayed: it was soooo hard to make this story work without words. But I have to say, all the effort was worth it. I think. I hope.

And then I'm illustrating Aaron Reynold's The Carnivore Club for Chronicle Books, followed by Joseph Bruchac's Rabbit's Snow Dance for Dial Books. And some point, I'll be making (i.e. both writing andillustrating) my fourth book for Simon & Schuster.

Grand (Random) Finale Questions:
1) If you could choose any person (living or dead) to narrate your life story, who would that be?
2) What song would you want playing at the end of your life story after the screen faded to black and the credits started to roll?
3) In the DVD version of your life, what would be one of the deleted scenes and/or special features?

Now...I could pick someone at random to narrate my life story, but I don't have anyone in particular in mind. Also, I'm not sure what kind of special features the DVD of my life would have besides a commentary track of me sighing at every stupid thing I've ever done and said. But I do know my "final" song, and it's Holy Grail by Badly Drawn Boy. And yes, I have put a lot of thought into it prior to being asked the question, which I guess is kind of sad, but being as it's one of the last choices I'll make, I figure I better make the right one.

Oooooo... good song choice. Unfortunately, I couldn't find a clip of that song on YouTube, so I'll end the interview with another Badly Drawn Boy song... Thanks for the great interview, Jeff!

Roll Credits!

Joe Fenton's What's Under the Bed?

2008-09-30T21:34:00.006-05:00

Author/Illustrator: Joe Fenton (obviously.)

This cinematically illustrated book plays on a familiar theme: the nighttime terrors that every child experiences. Shadows ooze with toe tickling fear and ominous bumps go bumpity bumpity in the night... the darkness is a fertile breeding ground for the underbelly of the imagination. The nervous boy lies awake conjuring up bizarre images of the elusive monster that is biding its time, waiting to devour him.

This book, while well illustrated, seems relatively unremarkable, until you read it with its timely companion piece: Paul Auster's Man in the Dark.

In Man in the Dark, a literary critic, bedridden and in the twilight of his years, lays awake at night in an insomniac's melancholy haze. In order to keep himself occupied and to prevent himself from wallowing in the painful memories of his past, he allows his imagination to spin fantastical tales of alternate universes that evolve into all kind of metafictional fun.

(I don't want to go into too much detail because I don't want to spoil the plot. I mean, have you seen a picture of Paul Auster? You don't want to get on his bad side or he might bump you off in the night with his evil eye (of which he has two).)

These two tragic figures represent the fears that bookend our lives. On the one hand, we have a young boy who is terrified of the unknown: his future lurking just beyond his grasp. On the other hand, we have an old man who is terrified of the known: his dark past that is filled with the montrosity of his own mistakes.

One is burdened by the nascent existential crisis that fills his youthful nights with trepidation, afraid that he has a lifetime of pain and suffering ahead of him (not to be melodramatic or anything). The other is and old man, afraid to look back on his past--desperately trying to avoid confrontation with the shameful past that haunts his guilt-riddled nights. But then, backing slowly away from ones past, he runs the risk of falling over the edge into the abyss of the ultimate unknown: death.

As a youth, the boy is afraid of the dark. As an old man, je is afraid because he realizes that he is the dark... that over the course of a lifetime, he has traded potential and innocence for the consuming darkness of failure and disappointment. The monster that teases you as a child is none other than your future, the dark fate that you know in the deepest darkest part of your soul that you cannot escape.

Together, these two works comprise the basis of what is becoming known as Post-Post-9-11 fiction. In the days immediately after those horrible terrorist attacks (Post-9-11), America's consciousness was filled with fear of the unknown, the illusion of safety was abruptly torn away from them and the world was once again a fearful place with shadowy caves filled with monsters waiting to attack.

Now we find ourselves in a place (Post-Post-9-11) where we have the ability to see beyond our fears and face ourselves in the mirror. As a nation, we are now marked by the stain of tortures at Guantanamo Bay, preemptive wars, Sarah Palin... our fears have led us down a twisted path and transformed us into that which we feared all along. We have awoken in the middle of the night to find ourselves lost... and in the dark.

Well, that ended up being much darker than I had meant it to be. Life is not that bleak, there is still hope! To prove it, let's end on a lighter note with that adorable laughing baby!

Poor kid... has no idea what's waiting for him...

Change We Can See Out the Window

2008-09-17T21:03:00.007-05:00

Hey! A dog with a fluffy tail!

BSB Flashback: Ronald Reagan: Paper Dolls in Full Color

2008-09-12T15:55:00.008-05:00

Yesterday, I reached a tipping point in my frustration with the rapid decay of our political discourse and by the fact that we appear to have wandered into a long-lost Joseph Heller or George Orwell novel. Seeing that things were turning ugly (and ridiculous) quickly, and that Obama seemed to be painted into a corner, I used my lunchbreak to take a stab at figuring out how Obama could possibly respond. This is what I came up with.

Though maybe I should have saved my lunchtime and read what Paul Krugman wrote which made the same points. But he makes those points with facial hair, which gives him a decided edge... that and the fact that he writes for the New York Times.

Okay then, now that my brief foray as imaginary speechwriter is over, it's back to picture books for me!

Flashback to: 24 February 2008

Author/Illustrator: Tom Tierney

Anyone following the election knows that every Republican nominee had been desperately trying stake claim as the heir apparent to Ronald Reagan. Mitt Romney had the looks, but not the soul. Fred Thompson had the acting chops, but not the stamina. Mike Huckabee had the charm, but not the stature. (I'm not even going to bother with Giuliani and Ron Paul... the rest of the country isn't, why should I?)

Now, for all intents and purposes, there is one GOP candidate left standing: John McCain. And now, thanks to Tierney's book, McCain can actually put on Reagan's clothes and try to convince America that he is Reagan's true successor.

Though I don't see it happening. Reagan's greatest asset was his gift as an orator--he was such a great speaker that he fooled the country into thinking that a silly idea like Trickle-down economics made sense. As for McCain, his speeches sound about as convincing as a 4th grader reading the book report that his mom wrote for him.

But still, let's take a look at how McCain might conjure the spirit of Reagan to convince America that he is as paper-thin as the Gipper himself.

Straight Shootin' John McCain

I am the candidate that is not afraid to tell it like it is. I shoot straight from the hip. I drive the Straight Talk Express. And the straight truth is that despite my better judgment, I have no choice but to pander to my party's base in order to secure the Republican nomination.

If that means supporting the Bush tax cuts, so be it. If it means fudging my stance on torture, why not? If it means denouncing evolution, bring it on! In fact, if I did see a dinosaur, I would shoot it dead and serve it at my next fundraiser to prove just how straight I can shoot... at whatever it is the base wants me to take aim at.

Damage Control McCain

What, this picture? I've told you already that Ms. Iseman and I are merely acquaintances. I am saddened and frustrated by the obvious liberal media bias being perpetuated by the New York Times.

I also find it comical--if a bit flattering--that anyone would believe that a man of my age would still have any sexual impulses left. Because my friends, let me assure you... when it comes to little John McCain, he's been little John McCan't for some time now.

Bedtime for Bonzo McCain

My friends, we live in dangerous times. We must take care not to let our guard down lest we allow the terrorists to win. Just like Ronald Reagan held firm when caring for an unruly chimpanzee named Bonzo, I, as your Commander In Chief vow to accept the challenge and stare the great ape of terrorism in the eye. And trust me my friends, I won't be the first to blink.

The Democrats don't have the backbone to put Bonzo to bed. But I assure you, the American people, that when I am President, I will not rest until we get the monkey of terror off our backs and we put the issue to bed once and for all.

When I consider the prospect of another neglectful Democratically-led country, I think back to something the great Ronald Reagan once told me. He told me, "Johnny, whether you're babysitting a chimp or battling terrorists, you can be sure of one thing: If you turn your back for even one second, you are going to get feces thrown at you." So America, the choice is yours: do you want to get feces thrown at you? I didn't think so.

It's Official: Bottom Shelf Booked!

2008-08-26T23:49:00.009-05:00

So yes, I have dropped off the face of the planet for a while. But now that our wedding is officially in the history books, I'm hoping to get back on the ball soon. (I'm hoping that marriage won't take the edge off of my juvenile sense of humor.)

For those of you who were wondering, everything went off even better than we could have imagined: perfect weather, beautiful ceremony, GREAT party... it reminded us that we are truly blessed with amazing friends and family. And in case you're curious as to what a Big Fat Jewish Buddhist Vietnamese American California Wedding looks like, you can get a taste of it with these preview pics at the AHS Photography site, courtesy of Amy and Aaron, the dynamic duo that helped document the day for us!

Now, time to head back to the bookstore/library to see what I've been missing out on this past month!

BSB Flashback: Corduroy

2008-07-20T21:00:00.002-05:00

10 October 2007

Author/Illustrator: Don Freeman

This is the classic tale of a department store bear who goes out in search of his missing button. In the process, he finds more than a button... he finds friendship and discovers the power of love.

Re-reading this heartwarming book tickles the little nostalgia bone in even the most hardened souls out there. Not only because of Corduroy's triumph, but because the story hearkens back to a simpler time, a Golden Age for Toys... long before things started to go horribly and profoundly wrong.

It's hard to pinpoint exactly when the downward spiral began, but there is no denying that the Age of Innocence is now no more than a distant memory.

Key Moments in the Descending Decency of Toys

Chucky: Not only did this bloodthirsty doll strike fear in children everywhere with its campy gore, but it somehow managed to spawn a lengthy Child's Play series, extending Chucky's reign of terror into the present day.

Left: Seed of Chucky. The low point of pop culture? The low point of all culture? The low point, period?

Tickle Me Elmo: Tyco somehow convinces the world that toys possessed by the devil would be perfect for Christmas.

Left: Comes with free exorcism kit, complete with vial of (faux) holy water. The power of Big Bird compels you!

Toy-tal Recall: Mattel recalls millions of toys because a manufacturer in China used dangerous lead paint... proving that dolls don't have to come alive and wield sharp knives to be deadly.

Left: Barbie. Apparently, her looks can kill.

Threat Level Tonka: The Transportation Security Administration announces that they will start paying extra attention to all radio-controlled toys in airports because they can be used to detonate bombs.

Left: Weapons of Fast Destruction: Batteries Not Included

And then, just when you thought things couldn't get any worse, last week came this latest sordid bit of news:

MR. POTATO HEAD IN ECSTASY BUST: "Customs officers discovered nearly 10.5 ounces of ecstasy tablets hidden inside a Mr. Potato Head toy sent to Australia from Ireland, the agency said Thursday."

Oh dear.

Yes this is tragic... but deep down, didn't we all see this coming? After his surprising success in Toy Story and Toy Story 2, it was only a matter of time before Potato Head was swept up by the wave of his newfound celebrity.

First came the funky hipster glasses, then the pretentious moustache, and then smuggling a body cavity filled with MDMA across international borders. According to an unconfirmed source, police searched Potato Head's luggage and found a box of glowsticks, 5 cartons of lollipops, and 26 extra smile accessories. Though this is the first time he was caught by the police, Potato Head has been seen living it up with Hollywood's party elite for months now. Next month's US Weekly will have the exclusive exposé, Mr. Potato Head: Lovable Spud or "Raving" Lunatic?

Left: Paparazzi capture a shot of Mr. Potato Head at a rave in downtown L.A.

So as you can see, between the War on Terror and the Bowels of Hollywood, toys have long abandoned the idyllic shelves of the Rockwell-era department stores. Since then, they have traveled down a dark and twisted path to a point where they can no longer be trusted, let alone loved.

So what now? Is there any hope?

Well, let me tell you a story. Long ago, a brave little bear named Corduroy set off into the unknown in search of his lost button. Now it's our turn to follow in his footsteps. Are we brave enough to march into the void to search for our lost innocence, not knowing what we might find?

Heck NO! No, we are NOT brave enough for that! Retreat! RETREAT!!!

Yes We Can (Read Harry Potter)!

2008-07-14T14:48:00.012-05:00

From MotherReader, who heard this gem from Obama this past week:

There was one question in particular of interest to us book lovers, and that came from a woman who asked what Obama would say to young writers. He was surprised by the question, which he admitted was one he hadn’t heard before, but didn’t hesitate to answer. He referenced his two books, and specifically mentioned how he wrote them himself, along with many of his speeches. With a light inflection, he said, “In terms of getting a job, knowing how to write is a good thing.” He talked about how he kept a journal, and how it was important for teaching him not only how to write, but also how to think. But my favorite part was when he said, “Over the course of four years I made time to read all of the Harry Potter books out loud to my daughters. If I can do that and run for president, then you can find time to read to your kids. That’s some of the most special time you have with your children.”

Wow. As someone who works in the field of literacy, this is pure gold. Now if I could only find a way to get my hands on a taped recording of Obama reading Harry Potter, then I'd be rich! It would be almost as good as this politico-kid's lit classic:

(Note: this isn't meant to draw any subconscious association between Obama and Jackson other than the fact that they are politicians who happen to be featured reading kid's books.)

(Another Note: I'm a little behind and I just caught the clip of Jackson saying he wants to _____ Obama's ______ off. Yikes! Apparently there are some things he dislikes even more than green eggs and ham.)

Non Picture Book Related Note: Showing My Age

2008-07-14T12:04:00.005-05:00

"These idiots should have their licenses immediately revoked and then be punched in the face."

-My immediate reaction to the popular Facebook group "I Text Message People While Driving and I Haven't Crashed Yet!".

Yes, I am slowly turning into a grumpy old man.

"Stupid kids! And turn that music down!"

DVD Special Features: Interview with Director Joachim Trier

2008-06-26T08:00:00.002-05:00

Don't ask us how we got our hands on this DVD Special Feature before the DVD even came out... just be glad for our ninja-like skills here at Bottom Shelf Books. So, without further ado, here is an excerpt from an interview with the director of the critically acclaimed Reprise with a surprising shout out to a beloved children's book classic.

------------

Question: Where did you get your idea for this story?

Well, you see, the story is about two young boys who submit their novels for publication. We thought that this would speak to a lot of people because, pretty much everyone we know has a novel that they are working on. So it's not autobiographical in a literal sense, only in the sense that we all have that urge to reveal our creative side to the world, it is what I call a universal biography. As I tell my friends, it is The Unauthorized Biography of a Basic Human Condition.

That didn't sound too pretentious, did it?

And yes, the internet rumors are true.... the idea for this story did first come from the children's book The Monster at the End of this Book (starring lovable furry old Grover). I used to read this book all the time as a kid. I found it absolutely fascinating and it played a large role in shaping my artistic and narrative style.

For those of you who haven't had the pleasure of reading Monster, the book is about Grover who is terrified about finishing the book because there is a terrible monster waiting at the end of it. Every page he tries to deter the reading, trying to convince him or her not to turn the page, anything to get them to not finish the book.

I reread this in college and it really struck me on a personal level. As someone with his own aspirations as a novelist, I saw Grover as the manifestation of all those internal roadblocks that were preventing completion. He was the sharp toothed monster of self doubt, the nebulous beast named procrastination, the debilitatingly strong giant's grip of writer's block... and any other of the millions of reasons why most of us never finish that book that we're working on.

However, at the end of Monster, we realize that the monster waiting for us was Grover himself. The real monster was the self-doubt and fear that was causing us not to push towards the finish line. Phewf!

I even wrote about this phenomenon for my final paper in English 420: Critical Thinking and the Author. The paper was called, Nothing To Fear But Fear Itself: How the Grover Complex Undermines the Creative Process Before Conception.

I won't tell you what I got on the paper, but let's just say that, pretentious titles aside, there's a reason I'm making movies instead of writing.

So at the time, Grover represented the internal stuggle to realize one's creative potential. But then, as some of my friends began to finish their novels, I realized that I was wrong. There is something to fear at the end of the book. That finishing one's torturous first novel is not the cathartic experience that everyone thinks it will be.

So many people fixate on the journey to completing their first novel that they don't realize that this is only the beginning. Writers don't realize that once they give birth to their first book, there is often something sinister waiting for them at the end... Reprise is a movie about this realization, about the journey after the journey. It is a movie about the real monsters waiting for you at the end of the book.

Because once you finally do finish, you come to the sobering realization that you are not completely self-actualized, that you have not reached the mountaintop, but are standing at the edge of a gaping canyon that will swallow you whole if you are not careful. Failure, Success, Fame, Obsolescence, the Publishing World... indeed, there are many monsters at the end of your first book. And unfortunately, these monsters are neither lovable nor furry.

Did I mention that this movie is a comedy?

In the News: Pig in Boots

2008-06-22T20:17:00.006-05:00

Talk about a kid's book that writes itself:

"An English piglet that was scared of mud has gotten over her fears, after being equipped with some miniature Wellington boots. Cinders, who lives on a farm in North Yorkshire, apparently suffers from mysophobia, a fear of dirt; she refused to join her siblings as they wallowed in the muck. Then owner Andrew Keeble's 12-year-old daughter, Ellie, suggested outfitting the pig with the tiny footwear, which had been adorning some key rings. 'Lo and behold, they fitted her like a glove,' said Ellie's father. Keeble, who runs a sausage company, said that Cinders would be spared the grinder. 'She's more of a pet really, now, and she's going to live a very long and happy life." (-from The Week)

No! That's Wrong!

2008-06-04T00:09:00.022-05:00

Authors/Illustrators: Zhaohua Ji and Cui Xu

No! That's Wrong! is a lot of silly fun with wonderful illustrations... and a brilliant underlying message about the steady democratization of information.

Plot summary: A passing wind lifts a pair of underwear off a clothesline and sends them flying onto the head of a rabbit. The rabbit immediately thinks that this is a hat and goes off to share the fancy new accessory with his friends. The rabbit's friends all agree that it is a fabulous hat, but an invisible chorus keeps calling in from the borders of each page to correct the wayward bunny. (No! That's Wrong!) A vagabond donkey even comes up to correct the rabbit by showing him a men's underwear catalogue. The rabbit tries to conform to conventional wisdom, but in the end decides to rebel against the chorus and wear it as a hat... if he says it's a hat, then by golly, it's a hat! And a fabulous one at that!

The passing wind that serendipitously lifted that pair of underpants? That wasn't just some randomly mischievous breeze... those were the winds of change.

It is clear that Rabbit represents the current information revolution that is drastically altering the way in which we view the world. We live in a world where we no longer need to be confined by the definitions that are handed down to us from on high.

Look around you and you'll see the signs all over the place. The mainstream news media is being undermined by bloggers. CNN runs regular segments about the latest video on YouTube. The encyclopedia is being supplanted by Wikipedia. We no longer collect information, we create it.

All of which are signs that we no longer need to rely on the establishment for our information and that we are looking at the eventual demise of the traditional concept of authority. Case in point: The character of the donkey is an especially targeted attack on the waning reputation and crumbling prestige of Academia.

The donkey (or jackass) appears in thrift store suit like so many disheveled college professors in their ratty corduroy jackets. The donkey attempts to assert his authority on the matter of the underpants, but ultimately it is in vain. Academia, which for so long had the power of authority and an almost monopolistic claim over knowledge is slowly losing it's edge. The ivory tower has lost some of its sheen.

(Question: Is the fact that the donkey pulls out a men's underwear catalogue meant to represent the conservative accusation of the uber-liberalization of the academic elite and its alleged disregard for "traditional" family values?)

By refusing to kowtow to the naysayers of the establishment and tearing down the borders of the page, Rabbit is releasing himself and his compatriots from the arbitrary confines placed upon them by the power elite. As noted linguist Noam Chomsky wrote:

"Unfortunately, the act of 'definition' is the most widely accepted form of oppression in the world today. By assigning arbitrary 'meaning' to arbitrary words, restrictions are being placed on the very way in which we are allowed to think. Limiting our ability to think limits the ability to communicate, which in turn limits the ability to act as a group, which ultimately limits our ability revolt. It is precisely these types of deviously subliminal mechanisms that undergird all modes of oppression. Now, this is not to say that Merriam and Webster are the worst tyrants of our time, but they may just be the most effective." (Language and Mind, p. 137)

However, this form of oppression has been slowly eroding over time. Jumpstarted by the advent of the printing press and continuing through with the rise of the internet, the spread of information has exponentially gained in speed and in breadth. Information is now so readily available that the classic vestiges of authority have lost their stranglehold on knowledge and meaning--the consolidation of information is a relic of the past. The world is no longer exclusively defined top down, now it is being defined bottom up as well. And when bottoms are up, the only sensible thing to do is to wear underpants on your head.

Viva La Revolución!

Surprising Underpants on the Head News Update: Just when you thought Washington couldn't get any more ridiculous... during a Congressional hearing on possible violations of the Geneva Conventions regarding torture, Rep. Dana Rohrabacher (R-CA) hones in on the phrase "panties on someone's head" in an attempt to undermine the Inspector General's argument. Unfortunately, by distorting and making light of the situation, he only succeeds in demeaning himself and his office.

Though he's certainly not the first and he certainly won't be the last.

BSB Flashback: I.Q. Gets Fit

2008-06-03T08:00:00.003-05:00

Note: They obviously got the idea for the Wii Fit from me, but I am still waiting for my royalty checks from Nintendo to arrive in the mail...

9 July 2007

Author/Illustrator: Mary Ann Fraser

I.Q., the class pet, decides to join in on the school's Health Month. Determined to show how fit he can be, I.Q. develops an awesome fitness plan that makes Richard Simmons look like a pudgy hobbit in short shorts. (Oh wait...)

I.Q. is a great spokesperson for fitness and does an admirable job trying to stem the rising tide of childhood obesity. Unfortunately, inspiring though he may be, it is going to take more than a doggedly determined mouse to get today's kids to change their poor nutritional habits and increasingly sedentary lifestyles.

If we are truly committed to getting kids in shape, we’re going to have to think outside the box and adjust to the times. In fact, our greatest hope in the battle against childhood obesity comes from the last place you would expect: video games.

Video games are often considered one of the culprits responsible for our decrease in physical activity and deteriorating health. And it’s true, sitting around twiddling your thumbs while staring at a television screen isn't going to do much for your cardiovascular system. However, it is much too late to cut video games out of the equation. So what can we do? Simple. Harness the powerful appeal of the Nintendo and trick kids into being more active. Enter the Nintendo Wii.

The Wii is an innovative new game system that incorporates actual movement into the control system--instead of just pushing buttons, the game actually requires that you get up and move. This interface gets us off the couch, engages more muscles, and gives our poor worn-out thumbs a much-needed rest.

This is not the video game industry’s first attempt to merge with the physical realm. In the mid 90s, Nintendo introduced the Powerpad, but unfortunately it never really caught on… probably because it was really just a poorly conceived rip-off of Twister (without the crossover appeal of being a drunken party game for grown-ups).

Physical video games didn't truly break into the mainstream until the success of Dance Dance Revolution, a maniacally paced game that allowed nerds to turn their video game obsession into crowd-pleasing and sometimes awe-inspiring displays of goofiness. It also took a lot of jumping around, which was great for the cardiovascular system and your quads.

With the recently released Wii being one of the most sought after items on the market, it is only a matter of time before the video game industry is in a full blown arms race for physically challenging game systems… producing video games that are a viable form of exercise. And just like that, the extra pounds will come flying off and obesity will be a thing of the past. Problem solved.

As the technology advances, the games will become more and more lifelike. At which point, thirsty for the most realistic experience possible (and addicted to the endorphin high that comes with actual physical activity), gamers will have no choice but to unplug and go outside in order to experience the ultimate in wireless entertainment.

...unfortunately, it had been much too long since we'd all left our living rooms. Having been neglected for so long, reality has been hijacked! An all-powerful monarch named King Bowser is now ruling the planet with his vast army of Goombas patrolling the land. But there is still hope. Luckily, you've been training for this your whole life... and finally, it is time to kick ass and take names.

Rate of Production... Slowing...

2008-05-30T07:58:00.005-05:00

So, you may (or may not) have noticed that the posts on Bottom Shelf Books are trickling out at a less than steady rate. (You could also say that the quality of the posts have gone down... but that would just be mean.)

Part of the reason is that we are knee deep preparing for an upcoming wedding and trying to do as much of it ourselves as possible. Like Save the Dates! Look, we're famous-ish!

Baghead Goes to Hollywood?

2008-05-29T22:12:00.006-05:00

Umm... I could be wrong, but something tells me that our buddy Jarrett Krosoczka didn't sign off on this Blair Witch meets Charlie Kaufman version of Baghead:

Everyone Poops

2008-05-28T14:09:00.004-05:00

Everyone poops... apparently even former press secretary Scott McClellan. Here's an actual excerpt from his much-hyped tell-all book (this passage refers to questions about the Valerie Plame CIA leak case):

"I could feel something fall out of me into the abyss as each reporter took a turn whacking me," he writes of the withering criticism he received as the story played out.

Can it be? Is McClellan actually admitting to $h!tting his pants during a press conference? I smell a NY Times bestseller! (No pun intended.)

"Don't worry, I washed my hands. See?"

Doctor De Soto

2008-05-27T22:50:00.001-05:00

Author/Illustrator: William Steig

Few know this, but Doctor De Soto was inspired by a speech given by Doctor Franklin De Soto, considered to be one of the earliest pioneers in the field of Dental Medicine. (Interesting fact: D.D.S. = Dr. De Soto.)

In his commencement speech to the West Virginia School of Dentistry Class of 1927, Dr. De Soto described, in surprisingly candid detail, the pains of devoting one's life to dentistry. Here is an excerpt:

"All of you have given years of your lives studying the field of dentistry. What was it that drove you? It definitely wasn't the lifetime of halitosis and plaque-caked mouths that inspired you to complete this grueling degree. So why did you do it? For the same reason I entered the field: the simple desire to help your fellow man. You were born with the impulse to alleviate the sharp pains of daily life and to soothe the dull and persistent hurt that plagues your neighbor. But I'm here to warn you: your idealism will not be rewarded.

This is what you will receive for your trouble: You will be the nightmare of the young children who come screaming into your office as if you were the devil himself. You will be subjected to an endless parade of adults who brazenly lie to your face... yeah, you "try to floss everyday", my ass. You will devote years to straightening the teeth of spoiled adolescents who will use their flawless smile to convince some poor soul to marry them--and you won't even get an invitation to their wedding.

So I'm warning you now: Dentistry is a thankless profession. For those of you considering a career in dentistry, do not for one minute expect accolades or even simple gratitude for your efforts. No amount of free toothbrushes or sugarfree lollipops will sway the fickle souls of your patients. Your clientele is like an ungrateful and unholy wolf, just waiting to take a bite out of your youthful idealism. That being said, I encourage you to proceed because yours is still a noble profession. But if you do choose to travel down this thorny path, do so with eyes wide open, or else you will be consumed by the very people you are trying to help. If my years of dentistry have taught me one thing, it is this: An open mouth is just a bite waiting to happen. With that, I congratulate you, Class of 1927. Best of luck. You're going to need it."

Rumor has it that a young William Steig was an undergraduate student who took Dr. De Soto's words to heart and decided to change his course of study from dentistry and pursue a life as an artist. Yet, as his book shows, he never lost his respect for the dental profession or the mousy old curmudgeon who took the time to tell him the truth.

Not a Box!

2008-05-13T14:36:00.006-05:00

It's not a box, it's Michel Gondry's latest project!

On the Campaign Trail: Duck for President

2008-05-08T03:34:00.007-05:00

Against all odds, Duck is continuing his historic bid for the presidency of the United States. Lately, in order to keep himself in the public eye, he has been making the talk show rounds. Here are some soundbites from his interview with Larry King:

On Senator Obama: "I agree with the Senator when he says that it's time to get beyond politics as usual. The difference is that I am willing to take it a step further. I think it's high time we entered into an era of politics as unusual. And what would be more unusual than having a humble barnyard duck your Commander in Chief?"

On His Temper: "I know that there is a video floating around on YouTube that has caused quite a stir. I admit that in my past I have had some anger management issues... but trust me, they are nothing compared to John McCain's legendary outbursts. Plus, that cougar had it coming."

On President Bush: "He is the definition of a lame duck president--I think America is ready for a change. I think America is ready to have an awesome Duck in the White House."

For more information, visit www.duckforamerica.com.

BSB Flashback: Do You Want To Be My Friend?

2008-05-01T22:13:00.002-05:00

3 May 2007

Author/Illustrator: Eric Carle

Hmmm... Carle might want to take this one back. In this story, a little mouse goes around asking various animals "Do you want to be my friend?" To which all the animals answer: "No." The mouse suffers one rejection after another until he finally comes across a fellow mouse. This time, when he asks "Do you want to be my friend?", the mouse answers "Yes!" and the two little mice go running off to play.

You might just think its a cute little story at first, but think again. Imagine the same exact story, but this time instead of animals, the story features little kids. Not so cute anymore, is it? The story carries an underlying message of self-segregation that is a little unsettling. Hopefully, this politically-incorrect theme was unintentional. Given his stellar track record, I am willing to give Carle the benefit of the doubt--for now. But I'm keeping my eye on you, Eric.

Silver Lining Note: On the bright side, with a little controversy, comes... THE TEACHABLE MOMENT!!! This is the perfect opportunity to engage your child in a frank discussion about race relations in modern day America. You can start by asking, How come none of the other animals wanted to be the mouse's friend? or Why did the two mice end up being friends? or Why was the elephant such a big jerk?

Then, have your child read Why Are All the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria? And Other Conversations About Race, and write a 12 page paper analyzing playground dynamics to create a theoretical framework that outlines the challenges of identity formation in the multicultural climate of today's American society. 11 point font, single spaced, and with full citations (APA format). And make sure they take it seriously, because this assignment counts for 50% of their childhood.

Can Leo the Late Bloomer Guide the Celtics to the Championship?

2008-04-25T14:39:00.009-05:00

The Sports Guy compares the Celtics young point guard Rajon Rondo to Leo the Late Bloomer.

An excerpt:

"Not only has Rajon Rondo's belated emergence been the most fascinating subplot of a storybook Celtics season, but he's just like the character in that book. Like Leo, Rondo never spoke. Like Leo's father, Celts fans spent an inordinate amount of time wondering when Rondo would "draw" (in this case, play with consistency) or "write" (in this case, bang home open jumpers). Leo had patient parents who believed in him; Rondo had veterans such as Kevin Garnett and Ray Allen, role models who provided the confidence and toughness he desperately needed, eventually springing him from his on-court shell and altering the course of his career."

Read the full article here. Next week he uses Kevin Sherry's I'm the Biggest Thing in the Ocean! to put the New England Patriot's failed bid for an undefeated season into perspective.

New Reality TV Show

2008-04-21T22:33:00.015-05:00

From the producers that brought you Iron Chef America and Ace of Cakes, the Food Network is proud to present its newest mouth-watering hit:

Tune in to watch as these five contestants go head-to-head in a series of bizarre and morally challenging competitions. Can the children navigate these sugary obstacles without giving into temptation? Who will be the last one standing and who will take a one way trip down the chocolate river?

There's only one way to find out! Coming this Fall! Thursday nights at 9pm! It's so sweet, you'll have to wash it down with a glass of milk!

At stake for the Sweet Life contestants is their own Chocolate Factory, a private army of Oompa Loompas*, and the chance to live every child's dream.

Do not miss this groundbreaking show! Hosted by the incomparable Willy Wonka and featuring celebrity guest judges like Anthony Bourdain, the Jelly Bean Craving Ghost of Ronald Reagan, and Macy Gray, this first season promises to be Scrumdidilyumptious!

---------------------------------
The Sweet Life is brought to you by Hershey's USA and the American Dental Association.

(*Note: The Army of Oompa Loompas is contingent upon ongoing negotiations with the United Candy Factory Workers of America. The Oompa Loompas are currently on strike and demanding fair wages and new haircuts. If the negotiations reach a stalemate, in lieu of an Oompa Loompa Army, the Sweet Life winner will receive their choice of a glass elevator or a boat that goes through a creepy bug tunnel.)

So You Want To Be President: YouTube Edition

2008-04-07T19:47:00.036-05:00

Author: Judith St. George
Illustrator: David Small

So you want to be president? Well, be prepared to be sent through the ringer, my young friend.

All presidential candidates must endure an unbelievable amount of scrutiny, but this year the long arm of the internet has really taken it up a notch. This election will undoubtedly go down in the history books as the YouTube election. From Obama Girl to McCain's 10,000 years to Clinton's Bosnia travails, YouTube exposure is playing a huge role in selecting our next president.

So the burning question is: How would past presidents have been affected by the all seeing eye of YouTube?

William Howard Taft
About This Video

His 1909 election was nearly cut short when the embarassing footage of Taft winning the 1897 Cleveland Deviled Egg Eating Contest hits the internets.

Franklin Delano Roosevelt
About This Video

FDR's presidency was severely challenged by this leaked footage of him playing Murderball. His poll numbers took a plunge, not because America realizes that their president is in a wheelchair, but because he only scored one point and fouled out midway through the second quarter.

Richard Nixon
About This Video

This clip of Nixon's star-making turn as Eliza Doolittle in the Whittier College Drama Club's production of My Fair Lady actually helped Nixon's popularity by revealing his seldom seen human side.

We'll keep searching the archives for more long lost YouTube gems, so stay tuned!

"Stop Making Movies About My Books!"

2008-04-02T08:00:00.004-05:00

Courtesy of The Onion, Dr. Seuss finally says what we've all been waiting to hear:

"Why it's simply an outrage—a crime, you must judge!—
To crap on my books with this big-budget sludge.
My books are for children to learn ones and twos in,
Not commercialous slop for Jim Carrey to ruin."

The Times They Are A-Changin'

2008-04-01T08:00:00.009-05:00

The American Heart Association just released a report saying that mouth-to-mouth is no longer necessary when performing CPR. They are hoping that this will make it easier for people to jump in and save someone's life... but what they failed to take into account was that they are doing irreperable damage to the lifeguarding industry. Not only have they have taken some of the shine off of the Baywatch franchise... but they have squashed the hopes and dreams of kids like the heroic Michael "Squints" Palledorous.

"What he'd done was sneaky, rotten, and low... and cool." But no longer possible. This is truly a sad day. Hopefully, it is just the American Heart Association's idea of a funny April Fool's Day joke... and tomorrow we can all go back to saving each other by making out.

The Secret of Water

2008-03-26T20:17:00.019-05:00

Author/Illustrator: Dr. Masaru Emoto

In this book, Dr. Emoto utilizes the mind-boggling power of photography to reveal the magic behind our most precious natural resource: Water. While the book does a good job of showcasing the glory of our liquid friend, the book is a little antiquated--because, as well all know, plain water just doesn't cut it anymore. Not when we've got:

-Gatorade: Nothing Hydrates Better On Any Planet
-POWERade: Power Up With POWERade!
-SmartWater: Electrolyte Enhanced Hydration, Vapor Distilled Purity

And now the latest offering of uber-water: Snapple Antioxident Water: Designed To Protectify!. (Note: I didn't make up any of those slogans. I could only hope to be so funny.)

But plain old tap water? How boring. How passe. How last century.

Plain water has taken such a vicious PR hit lately that local governments have taken matters into their own hands. Recent studies have found all kinds of goodies in tap water--apparently cities are taking a hint and looking to infuse their boring product with a much needed dose of awesome.

NYC Water! Designed to Soothify and Freakify!
Our water quenches your thirst and your soul with an enlightened mix of drugs that will take care of your aches, infections, seizures and high blood pressure all with one spiritually satisfying sip--and for all you cougars out there, we've added a dose of hormones to help out with that pesky menopause... rrrrowr!

DC Water: Scientifically Proven to Rock Your World!
Engineered by an illustrious (almost-certified) group of scientists, our water is ultra-fortified with anti-seizure medication, two anti-inflammatory drugs, two kinds of antibiotics, a common disinfectant... and because you've got places to go, people to see... CAFFEINE!!! That's right, we put the "what?!" in "water"!

Hmmmm... on second thought, after hearing about the medicine cabinet that's pouring out of my faucet, maybe it's better if I don't know the secret of water. I'll just play it safe from now on... someone pass me a Guinness.

Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See?

2008-03-20T20:03:00.015-05:00

Author: Bill Martin Jr.
Illustrator: Eric Carle

Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See? Well, if you take the time to look out your window, you may notice that spring has come unusually early this year. In fact, scientists have been tracking this phenomenon and have found that spring has indeed been creeping up on us earlier and earlier every year. Experts all over the world are trying to figure out what the environmental implications of this disturbing trend.

But we here at the Bottom Shelf already know the greatest threat of global warming:Grumpy Bears.

This is especially bad because we, as a society, have grown complacent. We have been lulled into a false sense of security by the friendly characters we see on TV... like that lovable thief Yogi and the disarmingly maternal Baloo. We have grown accustomed to seeing these mammoth beasts as nature's gentle giants. But this will quickly change as winters grow shorter and shorter every year. As nature encroaches on valuable hibernation time, we may find that these gentle giants are not so gentle anymore.

We all know that nothing puts you in a worse mood than waking up before you're ready (especially on Monday mornings). Now imagine that you are forced to wake up about a month early. And that you are 800 pounds with razor sharp claws.

Now imagine EVERY bear in the world waking up in a bad mood. Do you see where we're headed here? We feeble humans are no match for pandemic bear rage.

A Bleak Vision of Tomorrow: Yes, the children are still the future... but is that future in danger of being consumed by grumpy bears?

It may already be too late. This could be the spring when the bear nation wakes up on the wrong side of the cave and overwhelms the world with a deadly case of the Mondays.

Indeed, the first sign of the apocalypse may have come earlier this week with the whole Bear Stearns debacle. While the Fed managed to temporarily avoid crisis by bailing out the troublesome Bears, we simply do not have the capacity to buy out every Stern Bear that comes out of the woodwork.

And if this clip is any indication, all the money in the world won't make a difference. We don't stand a chance.

Bottom Shelf Properties: Featured Listing

2008-03-13T02:20:00.009-05:00

GREAT DEAL! MUST SELL!!!

This charming property may be a "little" house, but it has a big heart. It is strong and well-built and has withstood several relocations (Disclosure: there may be some wear and tear from city living). Classic design will transport you back to a more innocent time. Extremely motivated seller. No bid is too low! Will basically accept any offer to avoid foreclosure.

For more information, contact:

Real Estate Agent Virginia L. Burton
vlburton@bottomshelfproperties.com

Money, Money, Money

2008-03-04T11:34:00.024-05:00

With the threat of a recession breathing down our necks, Congress has decided to provide some relief with an economic stimulus package--which will include a tax rebate. Whether this will turn the economy around remains to be seen. But at the very least, it will put a little extra money in all of our pockets. So, today's question is:

What will you do with your tax rebate?

Harold: I've been meaning to broaden my artistic horizons a bit, so I'd really like to buy a new crayon... I've been wanting to get my hands on a nice Burnt Sienna for some time now. That would be sweet.

Mahalia Mouse: Student Loans. Student Freakin' Loans.

Very Hungry Caterpillar: I'm going out to buy some Ben and Jerry's, a handful of Jolly Ranchers, maybe a couple chili cheez dogs... and then some Tums. For some reason my stomach is killing me.

Clifford the Big Red Dog: Four words: World's Biggest Fire Hydrant.

Old Woman (who lived in a shoe): Well, given that I will get an additional rebate for each kid that I have, I should have more money than I know what to do with. The smart thing to do would be to put it all into an interest bearing account to build up a college fund for all these little rascals--but to heck with it. I'm saving the money for my retirement so I can move into a nice high rise someday, maybe something in a nice suede pump.

The Little Engine That Could: I'm hoping to go from being "The Little Engine That Could" to "The Little Engine That Doesn't Have To Anymore." Early retirement, here I come! Whoo! Whoo!

Corduroy: Forget a new button, I'm buying myself a whole new suit from Calvin Klein!

Runny Babbit: I'd hove to lire a theech sperapist. (translation: I'd love to hire a speech therapist.)

BSB Flashback: Max Moves to Moscow

2008-03-03T08:00:00.001-05:00

Following yesterday's election in Russia, it appears that there is a new top dog in town... though it looks like he will be on a tight leash controlled by the old top dog.

7 May 2007

Author/Illustrator: Winifred Riser

Max Moves to Moscow is a revealing story about America's influence on life in post-communist Russia. Max the black lab (democracy) moves from the U.S. to Russia. At first, he encounters an unwelcoming society that is buried under a thick blanket of snow from the harsh communist winter (and the literally cold war). However, due to his persistence and American can-do attitude, Max eventually makes friends with the dogs in the park and teaches them a new ball game (capitalism). This game proves to have a steep learning curve and the dogs keep losing the balls in the snow.

When the snow eventually melts, suddenly there are balls all over the place, ushering in a period of general chaos as the dogs struggle to deal with their newfound wealth. Yeltsin the Russian Bulldog eventually takes charge of the game and keeps the balls for himself and his friends... while the other dogs wait in long lines for toilet paper.

Eventually, Yeltsin eventually tires of playing and Putin the Russian Greyhound takes over. He immediately tightens the rules of the game by instituting a ruthlessly efficient authoritarian style of play. More dogs get to play, but they aren't even sure if it's the same game anymore... or if they still want to play. Problem is, no one dares to stop or even call timeout. When Putin says play, you play--because his bite is definitely worse than his bark. Case in point: the last dog that tried to get out of the game mysteriously died from uranium poisoning.

Ronald Reagan: Paper Dolls in Full Color

2008-02-24T19:38:00.015-05:00

Author/Illustrator: Tom Tierney

Anyone following the election knows that every Republican nominee had been desperately trying stake claim as the heir apparent to Ronald Reagan. Mitt Romney had the looks, but not the soul. Fred Thompson had the acting chops, but not the stamina. Mike Huckabee had the charm, but not the stature. (I'm not even going to bother with Giuliani and Ron Paul... the rest of the country isn't, why should I?)

Now, for all intents and purposes, there is one GOP candidate left standing: John McCain. And now, thanks to Tierney's book, McCain can actually put on Reagan's clothes and try to convince America that he is Reagan's true successor.

Though I don't see it happening. Reagan's greatest asset was his gift as an orator--he was such a great speaker that he fooled the country into thinking that a silly idea like Trickle-down economics made sense. As for McCain, his speeches sound about as convincing as a 4th grader reading the book report that his mom wrote for him.

But still, let's take a look at how McCain might conjure the spirit of Reagan to convince America that he is as paper-thin as the Gipper himself.

Straight Shootin' John McCain

I am the candidate that is not afraid to tell it like it is. I shoot straight from the hip. I drive the Straight Talk Express. And the straight truth is that despite my better judgment, I have no choice but to pander to my party's base in order to secure the Republican nomination.

If that means supporting the Bush tax cuts, so be it. If it means fudging my stance on torture, why not? If it means denouncing evolution, bring it on! In fact, if I did see a dinosaur, I would shoot it dead and serve it at my next fundraiser to prove just how straight I can shoot... at whatever it is the base wants me to take aim at.

Damage Control McCain

What, this picture? I've told you already that Ms. Iseman and I are merely acquaintances. I am saddened and frustrated by the obvious liberal media bias being perpetuated by the New York Times.

I also find it comical--if a bit flattering--that anyone would believe that a man of my age would still have any sexual impulses left. Because my friends, let me assure you... when it comes to little John McCain, he's been little John McCan't for some time now.

Bedtime for Bonzo McCain

My friends, we live in dangerous times. We must take care not to let our guard down lest we allow the terrorists to win. Just like Ronald Reagan held firm when caring for an unruly chimpanzee named Bonzo, I, as your Commander In Chief vow to accept the challenge and stare the great ape of terrorism in the eye. And trust me my friends, I won't be the first to blink.

The Democrats don't have the backbone to put Bonzo to bed. But I assure you, the American people, that when I am President, I will not rest until we get the monkey of terror off our backs and we put the issue to bed once and for all.

When I consider the prospect of another neglectful Democratically-led country, I think back to something the great Ronald Reagan once told me. He told me, "Johnny, whether you're babysitting a chimp or battling terrorists, you can be sure of one thing: If you turn your back for even one second, you are going to get feces thrown at you." So America, the choice is yours: do you want to get feces thrown at you? I didn't think so.

BSB Flashback: Stick

2008-02-19T08:08:00.005-05:00

This flashback is in honor of the recently discovered Beezlebufo or Devil Toad, a prehistoric frog the size of a bowling ball which (according to Scientific American) may have eaten baby dinosaurs.

Note: Word on Capitol Hill is that Sen. Arlen Specter (R-PA) will be calling in the Beelzebufo to testify on possible use of human growth hormone... which is only slightly more ridiculous than Congress wasting taxpayer time and money on Roger Clemens and cheating in the NFL.

27 June 2007

Author/Illustrator: Steve Breen

This is the first picture book for Breen, the Pulitzer Prize winning cartoonist. With the story of Stick, a headstrong young frog who likes to do things on his own, Breen displays an impressive sense of humor and comic timing. One day, when Stick shoots his tongue out to catch a dragonfly, he gets carried away (literally) and embarks on a wild airborne adventure. Through a series of surprising developments, Stick excitedly explores the wild world... but will he ever make it back home?

Stick is merely the latest in a long and celebrated line of frog explorers. Indeed, nature's first true explorers were the frog's distant ancesters, those intrepid souls who first ventured out of the primordial ooze: the early amphibians. Frogs are direct descendants of those brave few who left the comforts of their homes to explore the unknown lands above the surface of the water. It's almost as if wanderlust is genetically encoded in frog DNA.

Young Stick also owes much to the most persistent explorer in frog history... an adventurer whose exploits are so well-known that he is known simply as: Frogger. Before Frogger, the frog population had to be content with life around the dank world of the pond. But Frogger yearned for more, he want to stretch the boundaries of his world and boldly go where no frog had gone before.

While people still wonder why the chicken crossed the road, no one questions the Frogger's motives. Frogger did not set out to conquer the world, he set out to conquer himself. Despite frequent setbacks and increasingly dangerous traffic, he refused to quit until he crossed every street that he came across. His indomitable spirit would not be denied... he would either succeed or get flattened in the process.

Left: An 18th Century Tapestry depicting The Wondrous Adventures of Frogger: Explorer Extraordinaire.

Other notable amphibious explorers:

Mr. Toad: Not content with life at Toad Hall, our hero follows Dante's lead and explores the depths of Hell. This harrowing journey is well documented in his memoirs: Mr. Toad's Wild Ride.

Kermit: Perhaps the most famous frog in history, Kermit was the ultimate explorer, blazing trails and opening doors at a prolific clip. He first burst onto the scene as the first frog in space ("One small hop for frogs, one giant leap for frogkind.").

Returning to a hero's welcome, Kermit leveraged his newfound fame into a legendary career in film and television. After conquering the entertainment world and winning every award possible, Kermit begins to feel that familiar itch to touch the void of the unknown... it was not in his nature to be content. So he set out to explore what he believed to be the frog's final frontier: Politics.

Stealing a page from the GOP playbook (which turned the celebrity of Reagan, Schwarzenegger, and possibly Fred Thompson into political gold), the Green Party convinces Kermit to make a run for the presidency. Kermit immediately accepts the challenge. In the first in a series of shrewd moves, Kermit selects his longtime advisor Fozzy Bear to be his running mate (Fozzy's down-to-earth charm and folksy humor polls extremely well down South).

Despite a spirited campaign, Kermit's bid for the highest office in the land eventually falls short (though, being a third party candidate in America, they never really stood much of a chance anyways). While he may have lost the election, Kermit once again wins our hearts when he ends his concession speech with a tearful rendition of "It's Not Easy Being Green."

Who knows, perhaps young Stick will go down in history as the next great frog explorer. But if so, it should be noted that he did not do it alone... he was standing on the shoulders of giants.

A Bottom Shelf Public Service Announcement

2008-02-15T07:55:00.014-05:00

I originally made this for fun. (Note: If you are in the field of literacy and you are a photoshop dork, yes this is considered fun. Stop laughing.) Then I thought I'd offer these up on Cafepress so that you could buy your own pro-literacy merchandise.

Unfortunately, there were questions as to whether it was parody (good) or copyright infringement (bad). But if enough people are interested in sporting their own YouRead merchandise, let me know and I'll see if I can outfox Youtube's legal team.

Valentine's Day Flashback: The Dot & the Line: A Romance In Lower Mathematics

2008-02-14T08:45:00.003-05:00

14 February 2007

Author: Norton Juster

In honour of Valentine's Day, here is a timeless love story from the man who brought you The Phantom Tollbooth. This is the story of a straight line who is in love with a dot. The dot, however, is infactuated with a freeflowing and "too cool for school" squiggle. The dejected line goes off and conquers his insecurities by improving himself through the magic of geometry. He then puts on an impressive display that puts the squiggle to shame and wins the heart of the dot.

Rumor has it that Juster wrote this book just before going to his 10 year high school reunion. True or not, Juster's book embodies the dream of every nerd in history: to return to the scene of his shame (high school) as a successful and worldly man that suddenly turns the tables on all those jocks and stoners by winning the girl that had so painfully dismissed him in the past. If this were an eighties movie, the cast would be:

Dot: Molly Ringwald
Line: Anthony Michael Hall (though my younger sister suggested Jon Cusack, which is probably a better choice)
Squiggle: Some unkempt combination of Christian Slater and Judd Nelson

Directed by: Robert Zemekis (only because John Hughes would be too obvious)

Happy Valentine's Day...

2008-02-14T08:41:00.000-05:00

...from the Bottom Shelf!

Yes We Can!

2008-02-11T21:06:00.001-05:00

Author: Sam McBratney
Illustrator: Charles Fuge

The cover of this book really does a good job of capturing the momentum that is building behind the Obama campaign. Here you see animals enthusiastically jumping in the air, which is appropriate because this election has drawn more interest and enthusiasm than any election in recent memory.

But note that the animals are not your standard elephant and donkey. No, here you have a kangaroo, a mouse, and a duck. In their diversity, they represent the vanguard of the movement towards a post-partisan political climate. We are more than just democrats and republicans, blue states and red states... I mean, a blue kangaroo? That's just silly.

Look a little closer and you will notice the leaves falling from the sky, indicating that we are indeed in a season of change, which has been one of the prime buzzwords of this election season. It is no wonder that Obama chose this book to be the foundation of his campaign message: Yes We Can.

Here is the Obama Yes We Can speech in New Hampshire, the one used for the will.i.am video. While the video is cool, I prefer the speech without the celebrities because, call me square, but I'd rather not have my vote swayed by the lead singer of the Pussy Cat Dolls.

Alexander, Who Used to be Rich Last Sunday

2008-02-07T23:26:00.000-05:00

Author: Judith Viorst
Illustrator: Ray Cruz

All this week, football fans across the nation are sympathizing with young Alexander. With all the betting that goes on around the Superbowl, many Americans used to be rich last Sunday. I mean, the Patriots seemed like such a lock...

It just goes to show, gambling is bad. Are you listening, kids? Gambling. Bad. Don't turn away, take a good hard look at that picture of poor Alexander and you'll see the fate that awaits you if you enter into the shady world of sports gambling. If you're not careful, you could be that loser in the unlucky football jersey standing alone with empty pockets and a deflated spirit. Don't let that be you.

Luckily, I don't gamble on sports (not that I have any money to gamble with anyways), so I didn't lose any money by betting on my Patriots (I know they cheated, but your team is your team).

Even though I didn't lose money and even though it is just a sport, as a Pats fan, I still feel like I've lost something on Sunday. I mean, as if this miracle play wasn't bad enough...

...someone had to go convert the play into the following clip, which has to potential to simultaneously taint a great Radiohead song and the memory of my favorite Nintendo game.

I may not have lost any money on last Sunday's game, but like Alexander, I felt much richer last Sunday.

Tuesday

2008-02-05T14:49:00.000-05:00

Author/Illustrator: David Wiesner

That's right, it's Tuesday. But not just any Tuesday... it's SUPER TUESDAY. And Wiesner's masterpiece, which features a night of flying frogs, is oddly appropriate on this day. How so? Not just because the title is Tuesday, but because Wiesner's surrealist vision asks us to challenge the boundaries of what we believe is possible. And isn't that kind of the point of this whole process? It's Tuesday, a chance to imagine the world as you would like to see it and to cast your vote accordingly.

For a minute, allow yourself to imagine a world that has finally woken from the nightmare that is the Bush Administration and consider where we go from here. So, if you are in one of the 24 states participating in this political royal rumble, determine which candidate's policies, vision, and leadership speaks to you and most closely matches your hopes and dreams for this country... and then whether by car, bike, foot, or lily pad, get yourself to the polls and cast your vote.

Because it's Tuesday, and anything is possible.